Worst Jokes Ever
What happens when you see corn looking at you in your window?
A corn stalk!
I like wine how I like my woman.
4 year old locked in a basement.
Your friend took a shower and used Pantene, but I got a watermelon to keep me clean.
I heard Microsoft got charged, why?
They couldn’t reboot Stephen Hawking.
What do you call Stephen Hawking when he eats too much?
As fat as Ben Dingley.
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?
Hot Wheels.
Why did he go to hell? Because he couldn't use the stairs to Heaven.
What is more time-consuming than children?
Waiting for your wife to go into labor!
What's the difference between a snowman and a snowgirl?
Snowballs.
How did Stephen Hawking get up the stairway to heaven?
He didn’t, there was no lift...!
Why did Stephen Hawking go on to Britain's Got Talent?
To sing.
Earlier that day...
Mars: Okay Venus, you need to stop with the puns.
Mission on space.
Mars: Moon? You okay?
Moon:...
Mars: Moon come on! Stop spacing out!
*Venus and Moon giving her the smirk*
What’s red and bad for your dental health? A brick.
What’s invisible and bad for you to breathe? Mustard gas.
What’s green and bad for you to drink? Radioactive waste.
Man and woman are having a discussion. The woman looks into the man's eyes and says, "Honey, you know how I like it when you walk up and stick it in . . . "
". . . but I love it when Bob walks up and sticks it in!"
Divorce is scheduled for next month.
What is an egg?
What time is it when you smell garbage? Time to run!
Dad goat: Son, do you know what I like to eat?
Son goat: No, what?
Dad goat: Goat meat.
Son goat: *Gasps*
Dad goat: Nah, I'm just KIDing.
There were 32 cows. Twenty-eight chickens. How many were there?
There were 32 cows. Twenty ate chickens. How many were there?
What do you call a pig with two legs? Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhhahahaa
Ya, I have a Hydro Flask.
H: My Y: Grandpa D: Sticks R: His O: Cock F: Up L: My A: Ass S: K: