Worst Jokes Ever
One apple a day keeps the doctor away; not logging onto servers using management or service accounts keeps SecOps people away.
I have eaten 6 babies, 9 adolescent children, and 2 infants in the past week ;p
Fucking Windows updates!
What's the name for a short legged tramp?
A low-down bum.
I have a great job for you, but you have to start it off...
Knock, knock...
Who's there?
I don't know?!?
Yo mama so fat that Hannibal Lecter couldn't eat her up.
What has 4 legs and 1 arm?
A pitbull in a children's play area.
The reason why Stephen Hawking died is because he tried to overclock his wheelchair.
I couldn’t quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but eventually it hit me!
Why didn't Steven Hawkins get into fights?
'Cause he couldn't stand up for himself.
I used to work at a candlestick factory, but only on the wickends! It was illuminating!
What's red, green, and slimy and slides down the chip shop window?
Abortion of chips.
Which brand of underwear does Thor wear?
Asgard.
Did you hear about the needle and thread shop?
Never mind, it was needle-ess.
My girlfriend called me a pedophile... That's a big word for a 1st grader.
What do you call my IP? 74.125.224.72 hahahahahahahahaha
If babies stay in their mothers for 9 months, are they not 9 months old when they are born?
Stephen Hawking died because his wheelchair couldn’t run Windows 10.
When Stephen Hawking died, he saw the stairway to Heaven.
He thought to himself, "Oh God, this is awkward!"
The past, the present, and the future were having an argument. It was tense.