Worst Jokes Ever
Don't you just hate it when you're the first one to fall asleep at a sleepover, and then you hear, "Prank em, John?"
The average French car has 7 gears, 6 of which are in reverse mode just in case the Germans come back.
Mother Nature deserves a traffic ticket.
Summer is speeding by way too fast. 🤣🤣🤣
It's opposite day today. I'm gonna tell an orphan that their parents are here.
What's the fastest thing on earth?
An Ethiopian with a McDonald's Voucher.
You need to eat makeup on the inside because, friend, you're so ugly and you're not even pretty on the outside.
What does a freshly pregnant teen and her baby share?
They both think, "Mom's probably going to kill me."
Some people say I like heights; others say I'm a daredevil.
In reality, I like killing myself.
Why is sucking cock inside the confessional booth the only thing that a catholic priest doesn't have to give up for lent?
Because catholic priests don't have to be vegetarians during lent.
My dog is called Syndrome. He jumps up at me and I shout, "Down, Syndrome! Down, Syndrome!"
I’ll make a joke about homeless people, but they just don’t work.
What do you call an Asian telephone?
Ling Ling.
What do you get when you cross a Jewish person?
Christianity.
I have a lot of respect for trans women.
That surgery takes balls!
The teacher asked the class to use the word “fascinate” in a sentence.
Molly put up her hand and said, “My family went to my granddad's farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating.”
The teacher said, “That was good, but I wanted you to use the word ‘fascinate,’ not 'fascinating'.”
Sally raised her hand. She said, “My family went to see Rock City and I was fascinated.”
The teacher said, “Well, that was good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word ‘fascinate’.”
Little Johnny raised his hand, but the teacher hesitated because she had been burned by Little Johnny before. She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word “fascinate,” so she called on him.
Johnny said, “My aunt Carolyn has a sweater with ten buttons, but her tits are so big she can only fasten eight!”
The teacher sat down and cried.
Yo mama so fat it took Thanos 2 snaps.
What do you call a gay Eskimo?
A snow blower.
What is Alabama’s family tree? A circle.
I hate it when a couple has a minor quarrel, and the girlfriend updates her Facebook status to ‘single.’
I mean, I fight with my parents all the time, but I never update my status to ‘orphan.’
What is the difference between an orphan and cotton candy?
Answer: The cotton candy gets picked.