Worst Jokes Ever
Someone stole my grass today. I went to the police, and they said: "What's wrong?" I said, "How could you tell something was wrong?" They replied, "You were looking forlorn."
What did one copper say to the other? C U.
Why don’t orphans play baseball?
Because they don’t know where home is.
I am the grand wizard, mak.
You need to eat makeup on the inside because, friend, you're so ugly and you're not even pretty on the outside.
Q: Why did the cat get arrested?
A: He was caught littering.
Q: Why did the cat get a ticket?
A: He was caught littering.
What's got 5 arms, 3 legs, and 2 feet? The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
What did the boy with no hands get for Christmas? Gloves! Nah, just kidding... He still hasn't unwrapped his present.
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Chicken.
Roses or daisies? Now I know what flowers to put on your casket when I murder that pussy.
Roses are red, violets are blue, the last time people got depressed ended World War II.
What do you call a disabled Chinese person?
Sum Ting Wong.
White girl: So this crystal cures my depression and helps me lose weight?
Me holding a rock of meth: YES!!!
Yo mama so fat she ate Saturn and mistook it for bubble gum.
What's a cannibal's favourite drink?
A Bloody Mary.
The twin towers are just like my mom and dad, they went to work and never came back.
Why can't an orphan have milk?
His dad didn't come back with the milk.
You are so ugly, Hello Kitty said goodbye.
You're so fat that you only know 3 letters: KFC.
When does a joke become a dad joke? When it leaves you and never comes back.