Worst Jokes Ever
In a thick Russian accent:
"Let's buy some vodka, pollute the earth with oil, and make insecure nuclear power plants that break all the time! Ah, yes. The mother land. A great place to be. Not like those stupid Ukrainian people who are living happy lives, they are crazy and need to die."
How emos propose: Would you please join my family tree?
Why did the baseball player go to jail?
Because he stole first base.
I’ll never forget my grandpa's last words to me...
“Are you still holding the ladder??”
What did the no head man say?
"Haha!"
Where was Stephen Hawking buried?
In a black hole. 😂🤣
What kind of number hates nuts?
17.
What brings kids to school every day?
A school bus 🚌.
There was a woman sitting with me.
I had to leave until she pointed at something—it was my butt.
I was confused until it was her turn for truth or dare.
I just watched a program about beavers.
It was the best dam program I’ve ever seen!
Egg?
Two people about to have sex realize they have no lube.
In their desperate, horny haste, they looked for the nearest "Downy" and asked it, "Speak into my hand."
Upon their return to the bed, they regretted it immediately because his dick just stayed down...
Why do people laugh at mountains?
Because they're HILLarious!
I have a really good joke.
Do you want to hear it?
Oh wait, this is a bad joke website.
I am mis-steak.
This is so damn funny!
Lol, I keep stealing my dad's medication money, and the best part is he never remembers.
My mom showed me that she could deep throat a banana. I asked how you know how to do that. My mom said, "I practice on your stepfather."
How do you make any salad a Caesar salad?
Stab it 23 times!
Dams are dam strange.