Worst Jokes Ever

I mess up goats for unicorns?

Jimmy the Unicorn or goat.

I don't even know.

What does an orphan not have in common with criminals?

Criminals are wanted.

So, a bus crashes, killing everyone on the bus, and God feels so bad that He gives each one a wish.

The first person comes up, and she wants to be beautiful, so God makes her beautiful, and she goes into Heaven. The next person comes up, and he says, "I want to be beautiful as well." As this goes on, the last man in the back begins laughing a little, everyone becoming beautiful, until God asked the last person what they want, and he said, "I want everyone in front of me to be ugly again!" So God had to call the based department and gave him everything that last guy wanted.

I saw a kid crying and asked him where his parents were. He started crying harder.

The ungrateful brat. I see why he is an orphan.

What did one plane say to the other? "Let's fly!"

Why don't pirates take a bath before walking the plank?

'Cause they just wash up onshore.

Yo momma is so ugly, she gets rejected by dead people.

Wilt Chamberlain may have spread his seed among many women, but Kobe spread his brain matter all over California.

Why was the orphan's first phone an iPhone X?

"It has no home button."

Hola Jackie :^

What do you call mouse sneakers? Squeakers!

Global warming is the average of temperature on Earth.

Are you a rope? Because I want to hang sometimes.

If reincarnation is correct, if you die now, you can be reborn and live a second life. If you were born in Ukraine, you can immediately live a third life.

How did the chicken 🐔 feel after escaping the fry cook?

Clucky!

How come orphans know how to do laundry?

Cause that's usually the mom's job.

You can play Jenga in two places now: New York and Miami (Chaplin Towers.) They probably have Jenga tournaments there every year.

What did the slaves say when they met their soon-to-be masters?

"Aaah, a ghost!"

My dad said he'd get the milk, but he forgot I was in his car.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Chicken.

Chicken who?

Are you chicken me????!!!!