Worst Jokes Ever
The optimistic midget's coffin was half full.
When was the last time you saw yourself in the mirror?
What is an orphan's least favorite store? Home Depot.
What's the difference between a puppy and an orphan?
Puppies get adopted.
Girl: Come over.
Orphan: I can’t.
Girl: My parents aren’t home.
Orphan: Oh, cool, something we have in common.
An orphan boy at my school did really badly on a test and started crying. I said, “Don’t worry, your parents won’t say anything.”
Why can't Asians have a white baby? Because two wongs don't make a white.
We gave Erik ten Hag 7-Up after Liverpool thrashed Man Utd 7-0. He said, "F**k you all!"
I identify as the Titanic, because I'm a wreck.
What do you call a guy in a wheelchair on fire?
Hot wheels.
Gnome.
"My wife is so crazy," said Beatem's McSmasher.
"Why?" asked his buddy Don Caretomarch.
"She's sitting on the front verandah packing my shit in boxes!"
"You getting kicked out, bro?"
"Yeah, all I did was break every plate in the house over her head. Some people have no sense of humor."
"Is she one of them woke bitches?"
A rich guy and a poor guy have their wedding anniversary on the same day. They meet each other at the shopping complex.
The poor guy asks the rich guy, "What'd you get for your wife today?"
The rich guy replies, "I got her a diamond ring and a Mercedes."
The poor guy asks, "Why did you get two gifts for her?"
The rich guy says, "If she doesn't like the diamond ring, then she can return it in her Mercedes."
The rich guy asks the poor guy, "What'd you get for your wife?"
The poor guy says, "I got her a pair of slippers and a dildo."
The rich guy asks, "Why did you get two gifts for her?"
The poor guy says, "If she doesn't like the slippers, then she can go f*** herself."
Anybody who doesn't like Pepsi is a Coke-sucker!
Trump built a wall that Mexicans can't get over it.
Why is there only a glory hole in the handicapped stall in some public men's restrooms?
Because a gay man that is not physically handicapped can't receive a blow job from a gay man that is physically handicapped under the handicapped stall.
Yo hairline so bent even Bob the Builder can’t fix it!
Your family is so poor, when you knocked on the door for money, I offered you a penny, and when you knocked again, the rock answered and knocked you out.
One man's trash is another man's treasure, he said when he found out his parents split up and he is being adopted.
Why can't orphans use iPhones?
They can't find the home button.