Worst Jokes Ever
Why can’t orphans have sex?
They have no one to call “daddy.”
Why did the chipmunk swim on its back?
To keep its nuts dry.
I wonder if Stephen Hawking heard the song "Gangster's Paradise." Oh, shit, he can't!
What does a Jamaican guy say to an Asian?
Poke me, mon.
What looks like peanut butter and jelly, and makes a woman scream?
Afterbirth.
I tried a pun about water, but people "sea" right through it, and when people complain, they are usually just being a beach.
How does a kid with no arms or legs like a video on YouTube when they say smash the like button?
They literally smash the like button "uuuuuugghghhhgBANG!"
I asked my dad, "Why did you paint rabbits on your bald head?"
He replied, "Because I thought it would look like hares."
Why are elephants scared of computers?
Because of the mouse.
I'm so lonely, even the alphabet says "Hi."
JK.
Germany: As long as America stays out of the war, we should win.
Japan: *bombing Pearl Harbor* Cowabunga It Is!!
What do orphans need in order to mail letters?
Food stamps.
"I created the Human Torch."
Spell "IOUT", no space.
Why is 3 such a helpful number? Because 3 helped out on a science project 4 5!
What happens when you mess with a farmer? You get the whole ranch.
Why did the Chicken cross the road?
It didn’t, it ran because it was running from KFC.
What did the sun say to the Earth?
"Am I hot?"
Why did the Indian cross the road?
Because he opened a corner shop on the other side.
You know the song "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus"? Apparently, Santa's the mailman.