Worst Jokes Ever
Why do orphans eat cereal with water?
Because their daddy still hasn't come home with the milk.
Person: So you know that person's name you say when you make a hoop, well he's dead.
Friend: Yeah, John Wilkes Booth.
Person: How dare you say that he killed Abraham Lincoln?
Friend: Terrible guy but he never missed a shot!
Why were the Twin Towers annoyed?
Because they ordered pepperoni pizzas, but all they got was plain.
Why do they call priests "father?" Because it's too suspicious to call him "daddy!"
Roses are red, violets are blue, When I see you, I play with my poo.
Say "ocean" 5 times and you say "oh shit!"
What starts with "s" and ends with "erm"? SuperM.
This means both "matrix" and "master" so take out the "u" and then you just get "master". When you think of sperm, you think of porn. If you're a master at something, you're also a star at it. So you get porn star.
Yesterday, I tickled my granddaughter's feet.
She is being born in 2 months.
What's the difference between a baby and a baked potato?
140 calories.
People in wheelchairs need to stand up for themselves.
What is an orphan's favorite Roblox game? Adopt Me.
Harry Potter has an invisibility cloak, I have family.
If I had a dollar for every gender there is, I'd have two dollars and a lot of counterfeits.
Two Asian people have a black baby.
Something wrong.
Me: Why am I an orphan?
Friend: I don't know.
Me: Ask your mom.
What do you call a guy who has sex on the Moon?
An “Astronut”!
Why can Chinese people play baseball?
Because they ate the bat.
Good night, sleep tight, don't let the bedbugs bite, and if they do, hit them with a shoe till they're all black and blue!
What do you call someone who is extra virgin?
Mrs. Frame.
The teacher once said to some students, "I was an orphan before your principal hired me."
The students said, "Oof, that is sad."
The teacher tried to ignore them and take attendance. She said, "Is anyone missing?"
The students said, "Your parents."
The teacher got offended and later that day quit her job.