Worst Jokes Ever
Last time I ate a vegetable, I got banned from my sister's group home.
Snow White and the six Dwarfs, Sneezy was caught by covid-19 quarantine!
Why did Helen Keller have a yellow leg?
Her dog was blind, too.
When I see the names of lovers engraved on a tree, I don’t find it cute or romantic. I find it weird how many people take knives with them on dates.
A vegan and a transgender jump off a cliff to see who will hit the bottom first.
Who wins?
Society.
What do you call a white kid who kills another?
Russia vs Ukraine hahaha.
My elderly relatives liked to tease me at weddings, saying, “You’ll be next!”
They soon stopped though, once I started doing the same to them at funerals.
Me: A lot of things changed since I got my wife pregnant.
Friend: Like what?
Me: My name, my address, my phone number...
What is the difference between a prisoner and an orphan?
One of them is wanted.
I went to my local shooting range today but was surprised when I saw on the news that there was a school shooting in my shooting range. I don't know who snitched...
WAIT! I remember how the joke goes! These two cannibals are hanging out eating lunch, which is a clown, you see, 'cause they're cannibals and one cannibal says to the other cannibal, "Does this taste funny to you?"
What is never ordered in an orphanage?
A family sized pizza!
I created a website for orphans, but there was no homepage.
What has 4 hairy legs and fucks my sister?
Me & my dad!
What's the difference between a priest and Woody from Toy Story?
Woody goes limp when a kid walks in the room.
What if little Johnny was doing drugs?
"Johnny, Johnny?"
"Yes, Papa?"
"Eating sugar?"
"No, Papa..."
Why are mountains 🏔 so funny? Because they’re hill areas, do you get it? They are hill areas, like a mountain is a hill area. It sounds like hilarious, so you get it.
A feather and a depressed boy fell at the same time, which one hits the ground first?
The feather, because the rope stopped the child.
I made a website for orphans. It doesn’t have a home page.
What do a 9V battery and a butthole have in common?
We know we’re not supposed to put our tongue on them, but we do it anyway.