Worst Jokes Ever
Who's the world's fastest readers?
9/11 victims.
Been getting a lot of paper cuts on my fingers lately, I guess it's a sign I should go lower.
Who remembers when Gwen was the only thing people talked about on this website?
Your forehead so big you got to take Tylenol pills, big like chocolate chip cookies.
Your forehead's so big even Barry Wood said, "Wow, that's huge!"
Yo mama so fat when I pushed her into the jacuzzi, it caused a level 8 tsunami.
Little Johnny was living with his grandpa during the summer. Well, grandpa had a beer, and Johnny said, "Grandpa, let me get a sip of that." Grandpa said, "Well, lil Johnny, does your d**k reach your a**?" And lil Johnny said, "Well no sir." And grandpa said, then no, you can't.
Later that day, papaw (grandpa) had a cigar, and Johnny said let me get a hit of that, and papaw asked, "Well, Johnny, does your d**k reach your a**?" And Johnny said no again. Then papaw was shooting his gun, and Johnny asked if he could shoot it, and grandpa asked Johnny if his d**k reached his a**, and Johnny said no.
Well, after supper, Johnny's grandma made Johnny some ice cream (the most amazing bowl of ice cream EVER), and grandpa said, "Johnny, let me get a bit of that ice cream," and Johnny asked papaw, "Well, papaw, does your d**k reach your a**?" And papaw said, "Well, Johnny, as a matter of a fact, it does," and Johnny said, "Good, now go f**k yourself because you ain't getting none of my ice cream!"
What candy loves shooting stars? Starbursts!
Five Nights at Freddy's: Security Breach
Apple tried to make a car, but it had no windows ;)
How did Helen Keller's parents punish her?
They told her to go find the light.
What do you call a pig that does karate?
A pork chop.
What makes a raccoon 🦝 very rich?
Its rings!
Why do trees never call Emos? Because they always hang up on them.
How do you get an emo down from a tree?
Cut the rope!
With great depression comes great antidepressants.
Why do trees always gotta leave me hanging?
Say "eye," smell "map," say "ness."
(I am a penis!) HA HA!
How do emos fly? They hang themselves.
What did the evil chicken lay?
Deviled egg.