Worst Jokes Ever
What's the difference between Madeline McCann and Batman?
Batman returns.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I’d never play a country song backwards for you!
Why do orphans only have 363 days in a year?
Because they don’t have a “mother’s” or “father’s” day!
You get on an elevator and you find the Pope and Donald Trump cowering from two snarling wolves. In your hand you find a revolver with only two bullets in it... what do you do?
You shoot the Pope and the Donald each in a leg and exit the elevator at the next stop.
What do you get when you goblin with a shark?
If chickens make chicken nuggies, does that mean dinosaur chickens make Dino nuggies?!?
CONSPIRACY!!!
If trees were sentient, they would make their furniture out of bone, flesh, and blood.
Now ain't that cool?
A burger walks into a bar and says, "Hi sir, can I have a glass of water?"
And the waiter says, "I'm sorry sir, we don't serve food here."
An orphanage is like a horse rescue: you rescue them, you rehabilitate them, and then you sell them to the highest bidder.
I should name my dog Ariana Grande.
That way I could say that I fucked Ariana Grande.
Why did Cleopatra bathe in milk? She couldn’t find a cow tall enough to have a shower.
Are you a bullet? 'Cause you're stuck in my head.
When my mom asks, "If your friend pays you to jump off a bridge, would you do it?" I say, "No, Mom... I'd do it for free!"
Prince will be coming back in 10 mins here is a joke.
Gwen: Prince sorry but I'm wanting someone else instead. You've just been a complete jackass toward me, sorry good night.
Prince: Please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Gwen: Good night!
Prince: Why?
Gwen: Because...now good night!
Prince: We can work some things out?
Gwen: Nope...NOW GOOD NIGHT!!!!!!!!
To be continued
Prince, I love you very much! Happy anniversary! Love you! ❤️❤️😘
So my depressed friend wanted to high-five the tree by the cemetery.
The tree left him hanging though.
What is the difference between a priest and anesthesia?
The anesthesia takes time to put you under.
You know why Santa's saying is "Ho Ho Ho?"
How else is he supposed to give boys and girls a baby brother or sister for Christmas?
Me: Why can't orphans play baseball? Friend: Why? Me: Because they can't find home.
Why did Jesus create the Devil?
He didn't recognize himself through the time portal.