Worst Jokes Ever
If you throw a nun, is it called a... Nunchuck???
Bosses are like seagulls.
They fly in, make a lot of noise, crap all over everything, then fly out.
Me: John, what did he do earlier?
John: Hold on, I’m trying to think.
Me: I thought I smelled poop.
A boy is sitting in a dentist chair getting braces, and a dentist comes in and says, "Brace yourself!"
Q: What do you call a guy with no arms or legs in front of a door?
A: Mat.
Animal jokes, eh?
Toucan play at that game.
Did you hear about the dyslexic cop? He jumped off his horse and blew his whistle!
You mom.
Why do orphans go to church so much?
So they can have someone to call father.
A baby seal walked into a club.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He ran out of battery life.
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because North Korea's long-range missiles can't reach that far.
What did Ron put in his diary?
I "Her-mio-ne" after I banged her last night.
Your nan's bald.
Why did the skeleton not go to the ball? Because he had no body to go with.
Just a joke: When Stephen Hawking fell over and hurt his leg, his dad said, "It'll get better, just walk it off!"
What happens when Batman sees Catwoman?
The Dark Knight Rises.
What is black, white, and red all over? An interracial abortion.
Did you hear about the flood at the circus? Lots of people drowned, and there were two clowns that survived and two nuns still in the audience.
The two clowns ran over to the two nuns, and each one put a nun on his shoulder. Then they waded out of the big top, up to their waists in the rapid, turbulent water. As they were reaching dry land, one clown said to the other, "If you ask me, this is virgin on the ridiculous!"
What do you call a gay scientist? Stephen Hawqueen.