Worst Jokes Ever
The fries were the slowest in the race and they said, "We need to ketchup to the tomato!"
Punch an orphan, what are they going to do? Tell their parents?
Did you hear they made an Emo-Hipster pizza?
It cuts itself, and you're supposed to eat it before it's cool.
What is a leaf mixed with mud called? Ligma.
Ligma balls!
Knock knock. "Who's there?" Not your grandpa, he crashed the plane.
What's the difference between an orphan and a second-hand book?
The second-hand book was loved once.
What do you call a group of depressed people? The Suicide Squad.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
One gets picked.
What is an orphan’s favorite beer?
Fosters.
What does a zebra and I have in common?
We both have stripes.
One day, Billy's teacher asked him, "I heard your mom had a baby. What did she have?"
Billy paused and thought for a moment and said, "I think she had a bicycle."
"Now Billy, you know that your mom didn't have a bicycle. What did she have?"
"Maybe it was a tricycle."
"Billy, don't stand there and lie to me. We're going to the principal's office right now!"
The teacher grabbed Billy and escorted him to the principal's office and explained what happened. The principal looked sternly at Billy and said, "Stop lying, Billy. You know your mom didn't have a bicycle or a tricycle. What did your mother have?"
Billy looked up, fear in his eyes and said, "Well, maybe she had a go-cart."
That was more than enough. "I'm calling your mother right now!"
Soon, Billy's mother arrived at the principal's office. "It seems that Billy has decided to start telling lies. His teacher asked him what you recently had, and he said a bicycle, then a tricycle, then a go-cart!"
Billy's mother teared up, and through her sobs, replied to the principal and teacher, "No. Sadly, I had a miscarriage."
Billy sat up straight and said, "I KNEW that damn thing had wheels!"
I bought myself the life-sized Jesus painting off of Amazon, and they had 4 nails within the pack. All I needed was 1.
The guy in the wheelchair at my gym can do so many pull-ups with the wheelchair on, but I said to him, "Don't skip leg day."
What is the best feeling for an orphan when he plays Grand Theft Auto?
When he is wanted!
Autoerotic asphyxiation because hanging in there can be hard.
Depressed procrastinators feel like they wanna kill themselves sometime soon.
Hehe.
Why do orphans look so ugly?
Because they have a face not even a mother could love.
Why can't a homeless person be in "The Boys?"
Because he would have beef with Homelander.
How I Punch my Brother: Wooden Sword.
How he is telling Dad: Diamond Sword.
How hard my Dad is gonna punch me: Warden Punch.