Worst Jokes Ever

I went to a library and I started to make fun of a disabled guy. He started crying, and I said, "Stand up for yourself!"

What would you throw between a priest and a nun? A bottle of whiskey.

I have a joke about paper. It's tearable.

I love telling dad jokes. He always laughs.

When you have a hand clock it goes tic-tac.

When an American has it go backwards, it's tactic.

Chuck Norris heard that nothing in the world could kill him.

So he tracked down nothing in the world and killed it.

Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room. It's not dead, just afraid to move.

Why can't you tell an Indian a secret? Because the red dot means they're recording!

Instead of the line, "This girl's on fire," my friend can relate to, "The baby in the oven's on fire, and I need to take it the f*ck out!"

How is sex like a game of bridge?

If you have a great hand, you don’t need a partner.

What do u call a lesbian dinosaur?

I like alottopuss.

What foods are orphans allergic to? Homemade food.

Why did KFC take orphan?

Because kids fattening center.

I don't need a punchline. Karens are the only joke I need.

Walk up to an emo and say, "I like your cuts G."

(True story) Today I was bringing some tortilla chips upstairs for some chips and dip, and I dropped them, so my mom goes “Oh, now they’re broken.”

And I took an opportunity to make a pun, so I said, “No, they’re just chipped.”

What's black and white and red all over? An American School.

Why are orphans always famous?

Because they say, "Go big or go home," and orphans only have one option.

I figure it's ok to hit orphans.

What are they gonna do? Go tell their parents?

What do you call an Asian k9? E10