Worst Jokes Ever
My grief counselor died just the other day.
He was so good though, I didn't care.
How does the zebra cross the road?
The zebra crossing.
My boy, I think it is about time that I leave this world. Now draw your weapon and kill me now!
*draws a picture of his "epic" sword*
"What... WHAT... WTH ARE YOU DOING SIMPLETON? I DIDN'T MEAN THAT KIND OF DRAW!"
What did the bee say after the execution? "The criminal has been beeheaded!"
What is a frog's favorite drink?
Croaka-cola!
My husband told me he just came into a lot of money.
Weird, he usually uses a sock.
Two Indians talk over a long distance using smoke signals.
In the middle of the conversation, a nuclear bomb explodes behind one of them, and a huge cloud of smoke rises silently into the sky.
The other Indian signals with smoke: "Not so loud!"
my therapist told me that time heals wounds i stabbed him now we wait
Did you know I'm a really fast reader?
I can go through a few stories in just a few seconds!
Does Eminem like M\&M's? Cause if he didn't, that would be like "they're" not liking "there."
Yo mama's so ugly, she went into a strip club and got paid to keep her clothes on.
What do you call a black abortion clinic?
Crime Stoppers.
If having sex for money makes you a wh*re, then what does having sex for free make you?
Non-profit wh*reganisation.
What movie do orphans relate to the most?
Spider-Man: No Way Home
What do you call a religious drug addict?
A crystal methodist.
There was a solar eclipse at school and we missed it, but it was alright. Your mum went to NASA and recreated it herself.
What does Michael Jackson and caviar have so much in common?
They both come on little white crackers.
What do you call a Chinese man in the summer heat? Boi Ling.
How much do 2000 pounds of Chinese noodles weigh? Won Ton.
We stopped by the reception desk, but the receptionist informed us, "I am wan kin the manager." So we just left in disgust!