Worst Jokes Ever
Chuck Norris catches Pokémon with his bare hands.
How many Quebecers does it take to change a lightbulb?
4!
One to hold the bulb, two to turn the chair he's standing on, and one to sing "Alouette, gentille alouette!"
What do you call an obese man with bipolar? Twins.
The irony of metal jokes is pretty fun. But it leads to a lot of people stealing them.
When do you know you are getting a good deal on a boat? -- When there's a sail on it.
They are making a movie about clocks.
It’s about time.
A cardboard belt is a waste of paper.
One time I saw a manatee all spray painted to look like a tiger. Needless to say, the first thing I yelled was, "OH! THE HUMANATEE!"
I like my girls like I like my wine.
12 years old and locked in my basement.
What do you call 2 spies fucking?
Undercover.
Two priests are in a bar. One says to the other priest, "I'll swap you two fives for a ten."
- I think you're EGGcellent.
+ Wow... You really CRACK ME UP with that joke. I think you're a EGGxtraordinary comedian.
- Really? Are you done yet?.
+ Are you kidding? I have a DOZEN of them.
What is similar between sex and fishing?
It doesn't matter how deep you go, it matters how you wiggle the worm.
What is a threesome with 3 guys?
Gay sex and a witness.
I got udder jokes too.
Incest is wincest. (That was above.)
Fun for the whole family!
Next of kin, count me in!
Sex dolls are alive in the Toy Story universe.
What do a bag of chips and a gun have in common?
When you pull either one out in class, everyone all of a sudden wants to be your friend...
What do you call a short cow in tall grass? Udderly tickled :)
"Where exactly are you taking me, doctor?"
"To the morgue."
"What? But I’m not dead yet!"
"And we’re not there yet."