Worst Jokes Ever
What is the difference between a school bully and a feminist?
The school bully does not hide behind their computer screen.
How many dead prostitutes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
More than three because the basement is still dark!
There is a kid in my class who is allergic to peanuts. He says he's gay. He can't be though... he's allergic to nuts!
What turns a girl on more than having sex with her?
When she finds out that you have a vibrator too.
What is the difference between Trump and a flying pig? The letter F.
The Annoying Orange called Donald Trump a copycat.
What do you call a bunch of bi-racial, retarded kids? Mixed vegetables.
What's the difference between anal rape and a microwave?
A microwave won't brown your meat.
What do you call a steak that tastes bad?
A MISsteak.
Break a wine glass: I give you bad luck for a year.
Break a mirror: Funny wine glass, I give you bad luck for 7 years.
Breaking a condom: Haha so funny mirror.
Mary's mother was a good person. Why did she die?
Because she got stabbed in the heart 60 times by a switchblade.
RIP Stephen Hawking who was buried today... he did always love black holes.
"Luck of the Irish my ass, I just blew a tranny and an engine in my truck both in the same week... Boy it really ruined my day when they found out about each other."
Anything can be funny with the right delivery, except for abortion jokes, because there is no delivery.
I have a friend who has no arms, her name is Suzy. I always tell her this one knock knock joke, "Knock Knock!" "Who's there?" Not Suzy.
Did you hear about the new German microwave? It has ten seats in it.
What's black and white and hard as nails? A nun on speed!
One day, two Chinese people with broken English go to America. When they arrive, they go to a small place to eat. When they look at the menu, they see "hot dog," but since their English is bad, they think it's literally a roasted dog and order it. When it comes back, they're both surprised, and one of them asks,
"What part of the dog did you get?"
What does a carpenter do after a one night stand?
The second nightstand.
A pun enters the room and kills ten people.
Pun in, ten dead.