Worst Jokes Ever
What happens at night in Bangladesh?
It gets Dhaka.
A blind man walks into a bar. And a table. And a chair.
Why the f was my shooting joke removed? It was funny, and this is obviously a website for morbid humor. WTF, I mean, worstjokesever.com. Come on...
I helped my son (who is missing his arms) unwrap his Christmas present. The ungrateful bastard just sits there and cries, and it's a pair of mittens. The ungrateful bastard is just sitting there, crying.
What’s the difference between a retard and a zombie? Nothing much, they both dribble, moan, are hungry, walk weirdly, and it takes a bullet in the head to put them both down.
What do you call a deaf animal?
Anything, it can't hear you.
When her head game is so strong, she sucks the chromosome right out of you.
Dark humor is just like food, not everybody gets it.
What did scientists prove when they saw a skeleton on the moon?
The cow didn’t make it.
I came home from school one day and told my cat a kid at school said I was an idiot and told me to go kick rocks, so I did, except I kicked him, not the rocks, and I called him the idiot for not moving out of the way.
How does the moon cut his hair?
Eclipse it!
When do astronauts eat lunch?
At launch time.
A millionaire LOVES alligators and filled his pool full of alligators. One night he has a party and says, "Whoever can swim from one end to the other of the alligator infested pool unharmed will get a prize, my daughter or a million dollars." Some people line up but they are hesitant. One man gets in the water, swims from one end to the other unharmed, and went to the millionaire. The millionaire says, "Wow, I can't believe you did it! So what's your prize?" The guy says, "I don't care about the million dollars or your daughter, I just want to know who the b@$*ard was that pushed me in the pool!"
What do you call a blonde in a freezer?
Her parents called her Cindy, so we should probably continue calling her that. She was supposed to graduate tomorrow.
What do apples and witches have in common? They both hang on trees.
I like my women like I like my wine: 12 years in a basement.
What's Gru's favorite Beyoncé lyric? "Who run the world... Gorls."
Your spelling is more morbid than any of these jokes.
Wanna know what is offensive? I don't know, ask feminist (sans undertale).
My sisters ask me, "Are you really a virgin?" I say, "That's nun of your business!"