Worst Jokes Ever

Your hairline is so far back that your dad still can't find his way back home.

What's the difference between an orphan and cotton?

One gets picked.

A man walks into a bar and says, "I'm feeling depressed. What do you have to cheer me up?"

The bartender replied: "A shotgun."

Is that a mirror in your pants? Cause I can see myself inside them.

I told the emo girl to stop playing fruit ninja on her wrists.

If the minions serve whoever is the biggest bad, then who did they serve 1930-1945?

Any joke that I make about 9/11 has a tendency to crash and burn.

If all your clothes were stolen, what would you go home in?

The dark.

What did the short Chinese man say when he was called a dwarf? "Da fok yu sai tu meee."

What happens when Rick Astley is getting an erection whilst singing "Never Gonna Give You Up"?

You get PRICKrolled.

Two wind turbines were standing on a hill.

One asks, "What's your favorite type of music?"

The other one says, "I'm a big metal fan."

How do you spell ihop?

Then spell ihop and say "ness".

Your mom is so slow, it took her 9 months to make a joke.

What are the two hottest cities in the world? Hiroshima and Nagasaki.

What do you call a rich Asian?

Cha-ching!

People say that biting off your finger would be as easy as biting a carrot if your brain didn't try to stop you. How the f do people know that and how many people's fingers did they bite off before coming to that conclusion?

What do you tell a depressed person?

Just hang in there!

My dad just found out and told my mom about one of their friends, Chad, who just murdered his wife, Claire. After doing that, he turned the gun on himself and committed suicide right after.

My mom's reply: "Jesus, Chad will do anything to get out of cleaning his mess, won't he?"

Are you my depression, because I’m falling for you?

Why do you call a priest a father? Because calling them daddy would be too sus.