Worst Jokes Ever
What would you find on a haunted beach?
A sand-witch!
"Hey guys, I'm a new jokester, remember my name as I'll be making a lot more!!! P.S. They will be much better than this one!"
What do you call a woman who says she can do anything a man can do?
Wrong.
What college can Stephen Hawking not attend?
"Stand" Ford University. :3
What does a blondie and a shotgun have in common?
Give them a cock and they're ready to blow.
What is Osama bin Laden's favorite football team?
The New York Jets.
If you want to pick on someone, pick on orphans. Let them tell their parents.
Double!
Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere!
Triple!
Why did Bob cross the road? Because he wasn't wearing his seatbelt.
Doctor: "I have good news and I have worse news." Patient: "Well, what's the bad news?" Doctor: "You have one day left to live." Patient: "What news could possibly be worse?" Doctor: "I've been trying to contact you since yesterday!"
Why did the family get mad at the boy for eating at the funeral?
While trying to season his food, he mistook his cremated grandfather for salt.
Did you know that statistically, 1 in 10 people live next to a pedophile? Not me though, I live next to a 10 year old boy with a fat ass.
Give a man a plane ticket and he will fly for a day.
Push a man out of a plane and he will fly for the rest of his life.
I was going to watch the origami world championships before it folded.
But it was only on paper view.
Two horses are standing in a field. "I'm so hungry I could eat a horse," says the first.
"Moo!" says the second.
A Roman walks into a bar.
He holds up two fingers and says, "Give me five beers."
My Smoothie Ingredients: - Bananas - Strawberry - The Blood of my ex - Peanut Butter
What do you call a burning church?
Holy smokes.
What do you call a midget with autism?
A weetard.
What do you call a blind German?
A not see.
Why did Michael Jackson call Boyz II Men? He thought they were a delivery service.
What do you do after your girlfriend with two broken legs dumps you?
Take her wheelchair, she'll come crawling back.
Knock knock?
Who's there?
Willis.
Willis who?
Willis dick fit in yo mouth?!