Worst Jokes Ever

What are the two hottest cities in the world? Hiroshima and Nagasaki.

Your mom is so slow, it took her 9 months to make a joke.

What happens when Rick Astley is getting an erection whilst singing "Never Gonna Give You Up"?

You get PRICKrolled.

People say that biting off your finger would be as easy as biting a carrot if your brain didn't try to stop you. How the f do people know that and how many people's fingers did they bite off before coming to that conclusion?

If you really think about it, every market in Africa is a black market.

What did the short Chinese man say when he was called a dwarf? "Da fok yu sai tu meee."

A man walks into a bar and says, "I'm feeling depressed. What do you have to cheer me up?"

The bartender replied: "A shotgun."

I was playing football with my friends, and I got tackled and got a penalty. Suddenly, the ground started shaking, and Penaldo emerged from the mud. He took the penalty, but since it wasn't Andorra, he missed. Shame on you, Penaldo!

Your hairline is so far back that your dad still can't find his way back home.

What do you say when you see your TV floating away at night?

"Drop it, Jamal!"

Fatty told Skinny, "Do you have any food? My stomach is empty and I haven't eaten."

Skinny replied to Fatty, "Well, doesn't seem like you need food, you ate the whole universe instead!"

I like my women like I like my wine. 16 years old and locked in a basement.

Bad jokes are like the planes in 9/11, they don't land.

What's the difference between an orphan and cotton?

One gets picked.

Is that a mirror in your pants? Cause I can see myself inside them.

I once fought with a man in a wheelchair.

He couldn't stand a chance.

My dad brought me some sunglasses, but it still wasn't enough to keep my son out of my life.

Ariana Grande had 7 husbands, so she had 7 rings.

What is the difference between a baby and a baked potato?

140 calories.

"Have you taken a bath?"

"No. Why, did one go missing?"