Worst Jokes Ever
Making fun of someone you're angry with is childish. Be an adult and hit them with your car <3
A cobra once bit Chuck Norris. After hours of agonising pain... it died.
How many times can 50 fit into 9?
Get in a van and find out.
A drunk man walked out of a bar and kept falling flat on his face. He wondered why this was until his wife spoke to him:
Wife: "Why is your face all bloody?"
Husband: "I was so drunk that I couldn't stand up, so I kept falling on my face!"
Wife: "Idiot. You left your wheelchair at the bar!"
Why do women rub their eyes in the morning?
Because they don't have balls.
I would roast you, but you don't have any meat!
You're so scary that even your hairline ran away.
You are the reason double doors were invented.
What's the difference between sand and a dildo? Sand has never gone up my ass.
Don't trust atoms, they make up everything.
What do you call a girl with an hourglass figure? -- A waist of time.
Roses are red, lemons are sour.
Spread your legs and give me an hour.
I saw a sign that said “Watch for children” and I thought, “That sounds like a fair trade.”
What's black and white and black and white and black and white and red and black and white and white and black and red and red and black and red and white and black and red and red and red and red?
A penguin in a blender.
The day after Chuck Norris was born, he drove his mom home from the hospital.
Q: Why should you stand in the corner if you get cold?
A: It’s always 90 degrees.
That time when you realize that Osama bin Laden and Carrie Underwood share the same birthday...
A blind man had an argument with a man in a wheelchair. The man in a wheelchair made fun of him saying, "look, there's a spider." The blind man simply said, "Step on it."
My arms are just a different texture pack compared to my body.
Apparently, as a 4-year-old, Hitler was saved from drowning in the river Passau by a local priest.
Goes to show once more that a lot of problems would be solved if priests could just keep their hands off kids.