Worst Jokes Ever
Rules of Dark humor:
1. All subject matter can be used, nothing is off limits.
2. No saying "Me" or "My Life" as a joke. Nobody finds those funny. We want actual good and meaningful jokes.
3. Don't Repeat Previously Posted Jokes. If you are saying the same joke that the person right before you posted you are just begging for attention and nobody by any means likes that.
I will add more in the future and be frequent on this site.
- Sincerely, Zane
What is the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?
The wheelchair.
My wrists have a different texture pack than the rest of me.
I was talking to this absolutely gorgeous woman, and I asked her, “What do you do?” And she said, “I’m a brain surgeon.” And I don’t know if this makes me sexist or not, but I was really impressed.
Most women can’t pull off sarcasm.
After an explosion at a French cheese factory... all that was left was De Brie.
I told my friend yesterday he's literally my dad.
He didn't show up for the rest of the year.
Why are most firefighters men? Because they like to find hot places and leave them wet.
My mother wanted to test my responsibility and wanted me to cook dinner for the family to help me understand how it feels to constantly cook for a whole family. So, me with my horrible humor, decided to make a giant joke for when dinner time came around, and so I just got four plates and set them in front of my family and I then said, "Here you are, a fine African meal." Then everybody looked at me in disappointment, and then I continued to say, "What? Poor taste?"
Yo, forehead is so big...the photo on yo driver's license says "to be continued on the back."
What did the choir boy sing to the priest? Nothing, his mouth was full.
Yo mama so fat when she stepped on the scale it said, "To be continued."
It's been raining for days. My wife is totally depressed. She keeps looking through the window. If this keeps up, I'll have to let her in.
You call it suicide. I call it a failed parkour attempt.
Why can’t Jesus be born in West Virginia?
Because they couldn’t find three wise men or a virgin.
Helen Keller walked into a bar, and a table, and chairs.
A man walks into a zoo. The only animal in the entire zoo is a dog. It's a Shitzu.
A little boy decided to burn a house down. The father put his arm around his wife, tears in his eyes, saying, "That's arson."
What do you call a depressed emo? Dead.
What has three balls and flies through space?
E.T. the extra testicle.
What were Steven Hawking's last words?
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