Worst Jokes Ever

I was invited into a celebrity's house, that's what I told the cops at least...

A person in NYC is shot every 5 minutes. Poor guy!

Me: Knock knock.

Person: Who's there?

Me: No-one.

Person: No-one who?

Me:...........

I heard Kobe was writing a book about helicopters, but it just wouldn't land with people...

I know, I'm going to hell!

Here is a dark joke for you guys... "Why do pornstars scream, "DADDY!" in their videos? Because they were child molested by their father!"

I kidnapped an orphan. What are they going to do? Cry for mom?

My grandpa died during World War II. He was the best concentration camp guard they have ever seen. RIP.

Me: *listening to music under a tree and smiling*

Random person who sees me: Awwww look at him, he looks so so happy ^w^

Me: *actually listening to depressing music that makes me wanna kill and end myself but just smiles to show that everything's gonna be fine even if it won't*

What do you call a group of black people?

A hoodie.

What’s the best part of raping an 11 year old girl?

Getting to kill the little bitch after you’ve finished with her.

What is Michael Jackson's favorite thing to eat from? The children's menu.

Toaster + Bath = The ultimate bath bomb!

Your mouth looks like it came from the commercials.

Teacher: Where is your slip so I can see you can come on this trip?

Orphan: Parent signature: ___________

What's an orphan's family photo?

A selfie.

Why did the orphan call her boyfriend "daddy"?

Because she wanted that D.

Donald Trump is getting all the perks of 2020. He got COVID and lost his job.

Women used to fear their nudes getting leaked.

Now it’s $3.99.

Why were ET's eyes so big?

Because he saw the phone bill.

Helen Keller walked into a bar, then a chair, then a table.