Worst Jokes Ever
Thing 1: What's the difference between nuts and almonds?
Thing 2: I don't know, what?
Thing 1: One gets hard faster.
Your teeth are sponsored by gap.
What’s better than Ted Danson?
Ted singing and Danson!
This mute kid was getting made fun of. I told him to speak up for himself.
Unpopular opinion about programming but,
"Uncaught TypeError: Cannot read property 'myUnpopularOpinion' of undefined."
What did Satin say to God??
"Bitch, what the fuck you looking at?"
Why are the English so good at chess? Because their Queen never dies.
I can smell your kids!
What should people do with their floppy dicks?
I give them a good wiggle waggle to raise awareness of something!
What do you call a pile of kittens? A meowntain.
Yo momma's so old that even scientists get baffled about where she lived before Earth was created.
Which is redder: a baby or a red car? It depends on how the baby was killed!
I couldn't think of anything because you're in the "countryside."
You went the wrong way. Always choose the right path.
The time I saw you and you asked me to be your friend.
Me: "Yeah... no. You're too ugly. Even your parents never loved you."
Kid: 😭
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
'Cause 7 8 9.
But why did 7 eat 9?
'Cause you need 3 square meals a day :D
Did you hear about the guy who invented the knock-knock joke?
He won the “no-bell” prize.
Why can't an orphan roleplay? Because they don't have parents.
Why did the dog cross the road?
To get to his owner.
A basketball player walks into a strip club:
"Hi, I heard I could bounce some balls here?"