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Worst Jokes Ever
Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?
Because he wanted to win no-bell prize!
Why do cats like to sleep on the floor?
'Cause it's a car-PET.
What would be a pet's favorite thing to click on on this website?
Cat-egories.
Get it?
What's the difference between a Ranga and a Brick?
A Brick can get laid.
Ur mom.
Oh wait, you don't have one.
A little boy and a little girl were taking a bath.
The little girl looked down and said, "What's that?"
"That's my little red sports car," said the little boy.
The little boy looked down and said, "What's that?"
"That's my little red sports car garage," said the little girl.
A few seconds later, the little girl said, "How about you put your little red sports car in my little red sports car garage?"
"Sure," said the little boy.
The little boy's mother was downstairs and heard this blood curdling scream. She ran upstairs. Once she got there, she saw blood all over the bathtub. "What happened?!" she said.
"Well, Johnny tried to put his little red sports car in my little red sports car garage...but it didn't fit...so I cut the back wheels off..."
What do you call a calf that is in no way brave?
A coward.
Yo mama!
How did the shark do on his math test?
Jawesome!
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There were 25 cows, 28 chickens. How many didn't?
(Ten, if you count in base 13!)
Yo mama is so fat, I took a picture of her last year, and it is still printing.
I take all my anger out on orphans. Why?
Because they have no parents to run to.
Are you a red light? Because I stop every time I see you.
Mom: They say our kid neighbor has blue blood.
Son: Really?
Also 2 hours later:
Son: Mom, the kid doesn't have blue blood.
Mom: Son, I-
There are two types of faces:
The handsome one, but the wallet is ugly.
Then there is this personal face full of bumps, but even they lack a wallet.
What do you call a sexually attracted pizza who spoons another pizza?
A Topping.
A skeleton walks into the hospital and said: "Doctor, Doctor, I broke my leg!" The doctor said: "I see..."
Me and my friend's life story on a daily basis.