Worst Jokes Ever
Imagine being such a low life that you need people to roast you to have stuff to do.
What's your favorite place that orphans can't go to?
Home.
Why can orphans only hit a triple in baseball?
Because they don't know where home is.
A plane is going to crash. There are four passengers and only three parachutes. All the staff are safe and are gone, leaving the passengers. Ryan Reynolds is the first. He says, "My fans need me," and jumps. Donald Trump takes another and says, "I am the smartest president," and jumps, leaving one. There is a pope and a boy left. The pope says, "Child, my life is over and yours has just begun, take the last parachute." The boy replies, "Don't worry - Donald took my backpack."
Why was my mate in "Mission: Impossible?" Because he couldn't find his dad.
Q: What do you call a pigeon that is full of poop that flies in front of a car?
A: A suicide bomber.
Why did Helen Keller's dog commit suicide?
Well, I wouldn't want to be named "asdjasdjasdak" either.
Why did the bee get married?
Because she found her honey.
I love taking my daughter out in the car. Every time we go over a speed bump, I tell her we ran over another dog. đ
Why can black people post offensive jokes about making fun of white people, but white people can't post offensive jokes about making fun of black people? Because white people have white privilege. Does it cycle?
Whatâs the difference between drugs and kids?
I donât do drugs.
Two businessmen bought the Milwaukee Bucks for $500 million. They are very excited about their transaction, for this is the only legal way to own black people.
Hitler killed 18 million and only died once.
Fucking camper!
I went up to the depressed kid and said, "I like ya cuts G!"
Orphans can get away with anything really bad at school, because they can't be sent home for it.
Which way did the cow jump over the moon?
The Milky Way!
Okay not a depression joke but... whatâs worse than 10 babies in 1 bucket?
1 baby in 10 buckets.
What did the Roman say to the gladiator?
See you later, gladiator.
I didn't get the joke at first, then it hit me like a plane.
Whatâs an orphan's favorite movie?
"Home Alone."