Worst Jokes Ever
Ever wonder how a Jehovah’s Witness spreads their word during Covid?
Now that you’re here, do you have a moment to talk about our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ?
Why download Fruit Ninja when you have your arm?
My girlfriend used to give the best blowjobs, then she grew teeth.
Q: What's the difference between Terri Schiavo and a tomato?
A: A tomato isn't a vegetable.
What is a victimless crime in the state of Michigan if you are an able-bodied man who is well-endowed, not white, and not a heterosexual male?
A white male who is heterosexual and physically disabled who is sodomized by an able-bodied and well-endowed gay male who is not white inside the men's locker room at the gym.
Why do the Twin Towers have Elton John?
Because Elton "IS STILL STANDING".
Why do vegans use blowjobs?
Because they can’t take real meat.
What do you call a disabled kid's sweat?
VEGETABLE OIL!
What's the difference between me and my mate...
I left my dad, while hers left with their friend Cancer.
The general proofreading Hitler's speeches was the original Grammar Nazi.
What does a Jew expecting guests say?
"Oy, vey, are they here yet?"
What did the blind kid say after receiving a cheese grater for Christmas?
"This is the most violent book I’ve ever read."
What’s the LGBTQ national anthem?
"Somewhere Over the Rainbow" by Harold Arlen.
My cousin said he wonders why people have sex with animals, and now I can’t stop thinking about it.
Ol’ McDonald had a farm e-I-e-I-oh.
Why are cops worried about drunk drivers and not elderly drivers?
Stephen Hawking prefers rolls to slices of bread.
Could never understand why people would say Stephen Hawking is a dead man walking.
What's the #1 rule of kidnapping prevention?
Don't get carried away!
Your hairline is so far back, it was in a different time zone on a flight with you.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where the home is.
Also, what do you call an orphan taking a selfie?
A family photo.