Worst Jokes Ever
So I went to the bank and a lady asked me to check her balance... so I pushed her over.
What do orphans do when they get a phone? They press the home button.
What do squats eat? Numbers.
My wife accused me of cheating. I told her she started to sound like my wife.
I don't understand why people hide under their blankets. It's not like the killer's gonna be like, "I'm gonna kill-....ahh man he's under his blanket."
What do you get when you cross an atheist an insomniac?
Someone who stays up all night wondering if there's a dog.
When a cat gets a sibling, do they say, "Oh, shit! Another mew kid?!?!?!"
Why can't orphans go to field trips?
Parent Signature_________________
Who's the smallest wife??
Micro-wife.
Damn! Really stole my friend's glasses. Well, now they're blind, but not really, they're dead.
An Emo kid in a tree falls. At the same time an apple falls from the same tree, what hits the ground first? The apple would be due to the kid's rope and noose.
The Israeli government is the biggest joke of all.
Rapboat says he has a rap career. Wrap career more like, wrapping burgers at McDonald's.
Diddy and Hawk Tuah walk into a bar. Hawk Tuah says, "Spit on that thang!" Only one walks out. 💀
Your hairline is so far back, it was in a different time zone on a flight with you.
My sister is so ugly that she had to have a child with me to keep the family tree going.
They are making new versions of the Star Wars films. The names have only just come out.
There is Star Wars: Attack of the Trannies, Star Wars: The Trannie Awakens, Star Wars: Rogue Trannie, Star Wars: The LGBTQ Strikes Back, and then there is Star Wars: The Last Straight Man.
Why can’t you private text someone in a community?
Because a community has more than two people.
What's the autistic kid's favorite song? Yours.
What is the difference between an orphan's dad and a boomerang?
Oh... one comes back.