Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call a Spanish toilet?
Elton John.
Yo hairline so ugly even Bob the Builder said he couldn't fix it.
A cop pulls me over and asks if I have been drinking.
I'm an honest person and say yes, I did, so I take off my sunglasses and tell him that I now had 2 glasses less.
Why did the Chicken Cross the Road?
Idk.
What happened to the cheetah that took too many baths?
The cheetah became spotless!
Like this,
it will give you good luck. See for yourself!
How did Capetian Hook kill himself? He wiped his butt with the wrong hand.
What's the difference between a McDonald's and the Twin Towers?
McDonald's has a drive-thru.
They are delicious.
Orphans have 363 days on a calendar because they don't have Mothers' or Fathers' Day.
I got a bowl of rice that you're formed like, an ice cube.
The orphan's best friend wanted to meet his family, so he took a selfie.
I try and try every day, but 5 keep coming out. There's so money at this point my walls are built of babies.
Why was 10 scared?
Because he was in between 6 and 9.
Once there was this kid that wanted to shower with his dad, so his dad said yes. Then he asked, "What is that?" and his dad said it's a chow chow train.
The next day, he wanted to shower with his mom, so she said yes. He asked again, "What is that?" and she said it was a tunnel with light.
The same day, he wanted to sleep with them, and they said yes.
In the middle of the night, he woke up and told his mom to turn on the light because the chow chow train is going in.
I got fired from my job at the bank today.
An old lady came in and asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.
Dark humor is like water: some people get it, and some people don't.
What do lesbians and turtles have in common?
They both eat plastic. (I'm sorry to the lesbians out there; this is a joke, not real.)
Why does Britain suck at chess?
They lost their queen.
Why do cheetahs have spots outside of their bodies?
Because they don't have them on the inside.