I walked up to some Arabs and said "Alawakba," then here came the second tower.
Worst Jokes Ever
(BILL is sitting in the waiting room, fidgeting with his tie. MR. SMITH enters with a clipboard.)
MR. SMITH: (sternly) Good morning, Bill. Ready for your interview?
BILL: (nervously) Uh, yes, sir! I’ve prepared a lot for this!
MR. SMITH: (raising an eyebrow) Great! Let’s start with an easy question. Why do you want this job?
BILL: (confidently) Well, I want to help your company succeed! I believe in hard work and dedication!
MR. SMITH: (nods) Good to hear. Now, what’s your biggest weakness?
BILL: (eyes widening) I tend to be overly honest.
MR. SMITH: (leaning in) That’s not really a weakness.
BILL: (smirking) I don’t care what you think!
(MR. SMITH pauses, surprised, then bursts out laughing.)
MR. SMITH: (laughing) Okay, you’re hired! We need more honesty around here!
We're gonna have to kill
no good Jack and Jill.
They’re draining the economy doooown!
They’ve spent our budget on weed
and lube to spill Jack’s seed.
They’ve ruined our wonderful town!
We're gonna have to kill
no good Jack and Jill.
They have no moralityyyy.
They’re spreading degeneracy.
We ain't what we used to be.
We’ve got to kill ol' no good Jack and Jill!
Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water,
but then they stopped at the tippy top to smoke some marijuana.
They went to the store, and got some more, to fetch a “few” more beers.
Next day they came, ran off again, repeat for 24 years.
We’re gonna have to kill
no good Jack and Jill!
They’ve banked off buying boooze!
They’ll drink and sell the price
at the original times thrice.
Corruption wins, the avg. folk’ll loseee.
We’re gonna have to kill
no good Jack and Jill.
Their kids’re in the business tooo!
They’re draining all our banks.
Give 'em well deserved spanks.
We’ve got to kill ol' no good Jack and Jill.
Jack and Jill Netflix and chilled and made a grave mistaake.
What a blunder, there was no rubber, now they’re a house of eeiiight!
A bolt went off, they opened shop to resell their porn and lean.
It all went swell, but for us, well, we’re now an oligarchy!
WE’LL KILL OL' JACK AND JILL!
Why was the rapper cold in the recording studio?
Because his bars were ice.
Why did the telemarketer cross the road?
I don't know.
I don't know either, but I hope there was a car coming.
Roses are red, violets are blue. I thought Voldemort was ugly, then I saw you.
What do you call 5 gays on fire?
LGBBQ.
Yo mama so fat when someone asked her to touch her chin, she asked, "Which one?"
Yo mama so ugly that when Hello Kitty saw her, she said, "Goodbye!"
What do you call a fat Indian sat on the floor?
A meatball/malteser.
Yo mama so stupid, she put a battery up her a** and said, "I GOT THE POWER!"
I love sucking on food because if you really think about it, tits can be counted as food, so I could technically suck on a woman's tits.
What do you call a terrorist in a wheelchair?
RCXD.
Your hairline is pushed back; we can see what you are thinking of.
So I was just chilling in the World Trade Center, and I got airplane Wi-Fi. I wonder why....
Egg shaped, dome, bowling ball lookin' ass, bald fuck with that 360 degrees ahh head, motherfucker look like a damn balloon.
Call me Kobe 'cause I'm finna use your head as a basketball and throw it at yo' parents. Mr. Clean, bootleg Saitama lookin' ass mfer. No hair? :(
Yo papa's wife is so dumb and fat that we had to use yo papa.
What do you call a terrorist at a cinema?
A box office bomb.
What do you call a donkey and a potato?
Assround
What is the name of Hellen Keller's dog?
NYAHHH NYAHH NYUUUU NYAAHHHAADUUDU!