Worst Jokes Ever
Sometimes, you've got to specifically go out of your way to get into trouble. It's called fun.
I said I’m losing my mind. My friend said, “You didn’t have much to begin with.”
Yo mama so fat...
...people in Florida start buying flood insurance when they see her waddling toward the ocean.
Why did Marxism never catch on in England?
Because then it would be impossible to get proper tea.
I thought when my friends called me curvy, it was a compliment, but it turns out they were referring to my spine.
You're like a stormy cloud, because once you go away, it's a nice day.
Your hairline goes so back that it’s ingrained in history.
Your hairline goes so far back that it has no records of it happening in history.
Your forehead is so big, explorers mistakenly thought it was Mount Everest.
Why does a kid never come home after a fight with their parents? Because they never found the key to the house again.
“Life is going swimmingly,”
“Tell that to Whitney Houston.”
Your hairline is receding so hard, they petitioned it to change for the McDonald's logo.
Your forehead is so big, they used it for the Berlin Wall and the USA border.
What has four legs in the morning, two legs at noon, and three legs in the evening?
A kitchen chair! Your momma sits in it for lunch, and your dad only manages to reattach one of the two legs that broke off by evening.
Cheer for fun on the telephone and singing, "We are family!" Even then, your dad, really, he's fat, just like your dad. And your mom's fat ass, b**** ass, looking like an Oompa Loompa self, looking like an ugly.
How can you tell if your husband is dead?
The sex is the same, but you get to use the remote.
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
Because she had no arms.
Knock, knock.
Not Sally.
I knew a guy who would always claim he had a buddy with an IQ of 1.
It turns out he was just looking in the mirror.
Q. Why aren't midget jokes funny?
A. They always seem to punch down.
Why is arson so fun?
IT'S A FIRE ACTIVITY!
HAHAHAHAHAHAPAHAAHAHIIRTAASIISISISHRNHHTHTHTHHNHSHSNIHTAHE
Day 83 of being trapped in þis room. I made a language. I call it hertof. I speak wiþ þe walls now.