Time jokes
Q: What is the difference between a tire and 365 condoms?
A: One is a good year, one is a great year.
A man dies of old age on his 25th birthday. How is this possible?
Answer: He was born on February 29.
1 hour challengeeee.
Teacher to Student: You are supposed to be here at 9 am!
Student: Oh, did I miss anything?
What is always in front of you but can’t be seen?
Answer: The future.
What do you mean cook? We wait till summer.
"You think THAT'S bad?!? Remember the time I was in Paris with Donny de Francovich?"
Okay, the time has come... I am finally leaving this website, so yeah.
I'm going to enjoy my life, so yeah.
I'm going to leave now, so bye.
Hi Alex, it's 2:00 Easter time. Freshfry is a scaredy-cat. He left when you left, lol.
What month of the year has 28 days?
Answer: All of them.
If I had a nickel for every time I saw someone as beautiful as you, I’d still only have five cents.
Time flies like an arrow.
Fruit flies like a banana.
"Back To The Future"-Doc: You can time travel to anytime in HISTORY, Marty, but NEVER go to the year 2021.....
My sister is really disrespectful, and her famous words are, "You're not my parent!" The next time she says this, I'm going to respond back with, "You're right, because I would have worn a condom to protect from you being born unlike my dad did!"
My dad owns a countertop store and sometimes he'll barter.
A lot of the time he will take things for granite.
A lot of counter-offers were made.
Can February march?
No, but April may.
I woke up today, and my mom said it was 1940.
You're so ugly that every time you look up in the sky, God says, "Sorry, can't help you."
Mommy is a YouTuber, she can never spend time with me.
Yo mama so fat the last time I saw 90210 was when she stepped on the scale.
Lucky for me I'm only 210.