Ur mom was so fat that even Jon Brower Minnoch was ten times less fat.
A married woman asked her husband if he saw the future. The husband answered her, "I have no eye, dear."
Life lesson guys:
Remember, being healthy is basically dying as slowly as possible.
The easiest time to add insult to injury is when you're signing someone's cast.
Why do orphans become criminals?
So they can become wanted for once.
"Like if u cry everytime."
I'm gonna finally put a stop to the fucking drama. I saw people bullying other people for years; Gwen was not the only one. No longer will I put up with this. No longer will newcomers. For God's sake, just do jokes! Please! If you want to bully someone, do it in your family! You people don’t even know each other, but we're still going through this same fucking shit every fucking day! Just make jokes, people! That is why it’s called “Worst Jokes ever” not “Bully people forever.” So shut the hell up and get to joking! Jesus! The only reason why I came here was to spread jokes and kindness like Gwen and others, not to spread hate and foolishness from people who don’t even know better things to do but to hate on stupid strangers from different parts of the fucking world!!!
“Addison, fuck off already, you're only 10 years old. What do you know?” I might be 10, but during my time here, the tragedies and horror I've experienced on this website have shaped me into someone more mature, able to share this wisdom. And if you're gonna laugh at me, spit in the face of me and my generous teachings, you will fall. I swear to God, I will make you wish you could never feel pain. But that would hurt me more than you. Please, stop the drama. That's all I ask. Together, we can make this website great again, like it once was.
Yo mama so old.
Her first Christmas... was the first Christmas!
A wise man once told me: "If you poke the bear in prison, the bear will happily return the favor when it's time to shower."
Why don't Indians play soccer?
Because every time they take a corner, they open up a shop.
One time i saw a kid crying so i asked him where his parents were god i love working at an orphanage
One time I went to high-five someone. I've been left hanging ever since.
So, a man goes to church and is dipped in water three times by a Priest as he says, "From now on your name is Michael, and you will shed your sins of gambling and alcohol."
Soon after, the man heads home and rushes to the fridge to grab a can of beer. He turns on the sink and dips the beer can in the water three times while saying, "From now on you will be known as Not Alcohol."
Every time a midget runs on the grass, the grass tickles their balls.
Your hairline is so far back my dad even took 48 hours to reach it.
Sorry, I got the joke wrong the first time.
Why can’t orphan learn about the ancient times because they don’t know what a mummy is
Why can't people in wheelchairs be gay? Cuz you can't be a fruit and a vegetable at the same time.
Why does an orphan's calendar only have 362 days? Because they don't celebrate Father's Day, Mother's Day, and Valentine's Day.
Who is older than the Twin Towers?
Billy Bob the 1th. He was older than the Twin Towers. He was born 3 minutes before the Twin Towers and is still alive today.
