Three jokes

My three favorite things are eating my family, and not using commas.

How do cookies 🍪 give three cheers?

Chip, chip, hooray!

Three men walk into a bar. The 1st says, "Hey, how's it going?" The 2nd one says, "Great!" But then the 3rd man says, "Hello, where did my wife go? I swear she was just here!" What happened to the 3rd guy's wife?

Tongue twister: Through three cheese trees Three free fleas flew. While these three fleas flew, freezy breeze blew. Freezy breeze made these three trees freeze; freezy trees made these tree's cheese freeze.

That's what made these three fleas sneeze. 👍😀

My builder was extending my basement when he questioned me because he found three dead kids in a corner tied together.

What's the difference between a man's wife and his dog?

Lock them both in the trunk for three hours and see which is happy to see you when you open it.

If a gay male is married to a well-endowed, physically challenged gay male that has been sleeping in bed for three hours nonstop, and he wants him to wake up so he can fix him his morning breakfast, how does he wake him up?

Wake up sleeping Jesus by giving him a blowjob.

How do you fit three gay guys on a bar stool?

Flip it upside down.

Jesus walks into a hotel, hands the inn keeper three nails and says, "Can ya put me up for the night?"

On September 11, Gemini ordered three pepperoni pizzas.

One came alone, one was late, and the third went the wrong way.

Why did the three 23s not go to the orphanage?

Because they already 69'd.

Stacy: Honey, I'm kinda new to texting, what does lol mean?

Justin: I'm not sure, "lots of love," I guess.

Margaret: Stacy, are you there? I don't know if you heard, but Amber and her three kids were killed in a car crash this morning. I'm in total shock!

Stacy: lol

Yo mama so fat that when she walked past the TV, you missed three episodes of your favorite show.

I saw some terrorists on Family Feud. It looked like they had three strikes!

How many midgets does it take to change a lightbulb?

Three, because it’s the normal person's height.

A man is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door.

He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch.

He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can.

Three years later there's a knock at the door.

He opens it and sees the same snail.

The snail says, "What was that all about?"

There were three women, one was curvy in all the right places, one was skinny but had a booty on her, and last but not least there’s one that has a BBL. Then comes in a famous rapper, guess which one he picked???

Three men were lost in the desert and found a genie who granted each of them a wish.

The 1st man wished he was home with his family. The 2nd man wished he was home with his family, and the 3rd man wished they were all back together again.

How many thots have I bullied?

Three. The rest are dead.

Us three get along well. I guess you could say we're the TREE-o!