In 2013, it was reported that China has lost around 28,000 rivers; over half of what they thought existed. Some say climate change is the cause, others say it’s their harsh, economic expansion that’s unapologetic to the environment.
My theory is that those 28,000 rivers were sold to underground river-sex trafficking.
One day, Little Johnny went to his grandma's house, and she asks, "Do you like nuts?"
Little Johnny says, "Yes, I like nuts."
His grandma says, "Okay then, grab them out of the cabinet." So Little Johnny went and grabbed them, and he was sad after he grabbed them. His grandma then says, "What's wrong?"
Little Johnny says, "I thought they were real nuts," and his grandma fainted.
*WARNING* THIS WILL NEVER GET OUT OF YOUR HEAD - READ IF YOU DARE.....
What came first? The chicken or the egg?
Which came first? The color orange or the fruit?
Who taught the first ever teacher?
If you expect the unexpected, doesn't that make the unexpected expected?
If you describe something as 'indescribable', then haven't you already described it?
In the word 'scent', is the silent letter the 's' or the 'ce'?
Why do your lips touch when they say the word 'separate', but don't touch when you say the word 'together'?
How many photos do you think you could be in the background of?
The guy who discovered cow milk, what was he doing with that cow?
Do regular dogs see police dogs and think, "Oh no, it's a cop"?
Is it possible to cry underwater?
If two left handers have an argument, who is right?
I warned you!! You just didn't listen.... :O
Hi guys, I am so happy and proud of myself and I thought I should share with you! Today I saw myself on TV when I turned it off.
Why didn’t the emo attend her grandma’s funeral?
She thought her grandma was trying to flex.
Yo mum is so fat when she weared yellow the kids thought they missed the bus
Yo mama so dumb that when she went to Starbucks she thought she could buy a star
A guy is talking to an Indian therapist.
He had a red dot, and the American thought it was from a sniper rifle and tackled him and said, "I thought the red dot on your head was from a sniper rifle!"
Have you ever had a friend who masturbated many times? I had one who did a lot, but he had no imagination... when he masturbated, he imagines his hand.
When my mom asks, "If your friend pays you to jump off a bridge, would you do it?" I say, "No, Mom... I'd do it for free!"
Are you a bullet? 'Cause you're stuck in my head.
Your mom is so dumb that she thought Dunkin' Donuts was a basketball team.
Your mom is so stupid that she thought LGBTQ was a sandwich.
Sometimes I look back at everything bad I have done. I tell myself it's ok, they're just telling me to keep myself safe :)
That's it, it wasn't a joke.
Yo mama so fat, she thought "RAW MEN" was "RAMEN."
Yo momma is so stupid, she saw an anime and started eating a live rabbit, and thought she would get powers!
Your hairline is so messed up, I thought a 2-year-old cut you up!
I thought I saw a cool sticker on my office window, then I realized it was getting bigger and bigger.
A guy and his girl just finished making love.
Just as they lay next to each other, the girl asks, "Have you thought about any baby names?"
The guy then takes his condom off and ties it, and says, "Well, probably David Copperfield, if he gets out of this!"
Teacher: Hi class, today we will learn about the song, "London Bridge is falling down, falling down."
Then one student said, "I thought it was 'Twin Towers are falling down, falling down!'"
