Texter 1: You know People treat me like a god.
Texter 2: How?
Texter 1: They ignore my existence unless they need something.
They Jokes
How do rappers communicate underwater?
They drop some sick flow-tation.
Why don't rappers ever get lost?
Because they always find their way with their flow.
Me: *reading a sign* "Children are a gift from god."
Me: "No, they are a gift from the underworld."
Mother: "Yeah, I picked you up at the gift shop on my way out."
Mother: "You are a spawn of Satan."
I'm what they call a ✨️askhole✨️.
A person who will consistently ask for your advice and wisdom, but then proceed to do the exact opposite of what you say.
They say the only curves Daveon likes are on his credit card statements.
Why don't rappers ever get lost?
Because they always follow the street signs.
Why can't Americans play chess?
Because they already lost two towers.
When baseball players want to get together, what will they do?
Touch base.
Why did the rapper take up gardening?
Because they wanted to GROW their FLOW.
How do rappers stay warm in the winter?
They wear their ice chains.
Why did the rapper bring a map to the studio?
Because they were lost in the BEATS.
Why aren't Americans good at Clash Royale?
Because they already lost 2 towers.
Why did the short person bring a ladder to the bar?
Because they heard the drinks were on the house!
One reason I like to tell riddles is because they help with critical thinking skills.
What's the similarity between a pepperoni pizza and Freddy Krueger?
They both have red circles on their bodies.
You're so ugly that when One Direction saw you, they went the OTHER direction!
Yo mama so thick, they need an aircraft carrier to take her places.
Bro, your hairline and an athletics track have one thing in common: they look like Humpty Dumpty.
Why did the short person become a chef?
Because they could "microwave" dinner without needing a stool!
