They jokes
eBay is so useless.
I tried to look up lighters and all they had was 13,749 matches.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
They don’t have a home to run to.
What do they call Dwayne "the Rock" Johnson's son? The Pebble.
Why do orphans not use iPhones?
Because they don't have a home button.
Why were the Twin Towers mad? They ordered pepperoni, and they only got plane.
Confusion life question!!!
* Can you cry underwater? * Do fishes ever get thirsty? * Why don't birds fall out the tree when they sleep? * Why is a building called that when it's already built? * When they say dog food is new and improved, who tastes it?
Why were the Twin Towers mad?
They wanted pepperoni, but got plane instead.
Why are the Twin Towers mad?
Because they ordered a pepperoni pizza, and I got plane'd.
Why can't 12 boys go down the elevator? Because they have nothing to press the buttons.
Your forehead [is] so big scientists measured it, studied it, and then finally they said: "Oh my God... your forehead is so big it's a 50 mile car ride from your eyebrows to your hair!"
Your hairline's so far up, they call it a skyline!
Why do people have a lot of money and they have to spend it on jewelry 24/7 all the time?
Why can't Chinese people play baseball?
Because they ate the bat.
Bored? Run over an orphan with your car! What are they going to do, tell their nonexistent parents?
Why are Americans so bad at Clash? They already lost two towers.
Why is America bad at Clash of Clans?
Because they already lost two towers.
What do you call an orphan when they eat a meal? A family dinner.
How many Tottenham players does it take to win a trophy? It doesn't matter how hard they try, they still can't win one anyway.
Last week I went on a whale watch.
After everyone had piled onto a boat, they loaded the boat onto a trailer and drove to your house.
Your mum is so ugly, she tried to join an ugly competition. They said, "Sorry, no professionals."