They jokes
My sister told me she liked Medusa.
I said, "Huh?"
My sister said my blow jobs are so good she looks up at the guy's facial expression, and when they look down, they do nothing but stay still.
I told my kids to smile with the monkeys in the open zoo.
They never got together at all.
Did you hear about the man who died of a Viagra overdose?
They couldn't close the casket.
If you're ever bored, just punch an orphan. What are they going to do, tell their parents?
What does a baby and a grenade have in common?
They both make a noise when you throw them.
Memes
Why should China be a baseball team?
Because they can take out the entire world with just one bat!
Why does an orphan start with an "O"?
Because they only see their parents in their dream.
If you call the number 800-273-8500 in Afghanistan, they say, "Can you fly a plane?"
How many emos does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, they just sit there and cry in the dark.
Why don't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't run home.
Why can't orphans play sports?
They don't know what a home team is.
If you are ever mad, punch an orphan.
What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
Why do trees never call emo kids? Because they always hang up on them.
You know they're lying when they say, "My mom's picking me up."
Why don't orphans go home at pickup?
Because they don't have parents to pick them up.
Why do orphans love Oreos?
Because when they have a family pack, they can eat it all!
Why can't orphans be gay?
They have nobody to call "Daddy~"
Do you know why dead baby jokes are always funny?
They never get old.
What do a priest and Christmas tree lights have in common?
They can both flash.
What do my balls and emos have in common?
...Nothing, they both hang themselves...