They jokes
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they can't find home.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't have a home base.
Why can you never surprise mountains?
They peak.
What is the similarity between orphans and apples?
They both get thrown out.
Why can't lesbians wear makeup while on a diet?
Because they can't eat Jenny Craig while Mary Kay is sitting on their face.
Why are wives also called a housekeeper?
Because after the divorce, they keep the house.
Your family is so messed up that they shared one brain cell to have you even exist.
Why can't a homeless person win a baseball game?
They can't find home plate.
Q: What's the difference between a CEO and a beer can?
A: Beer cans don't bleed when they get shot.
Straights are ALWAYS asking LGBTQ+ people why they have such GOOD FASHION SENSE. We didn't spend all that time in the closet for nothing, honey ;)
Gwen: Prince, they told me you'd be crying back. What do you want?
Prince: Nothing...BUT CAN WE GET BACK TOGETHER!?!??
Gwen: Sorry...BUT...I have a life to live now. I'm logging off this site and going to watch some TV. I'll be back in 1 hour, but we are done...DONE...DONE.
Life is like a box of chocolates, they f*cking melt :)
Why is it poetic when they have plenty of those German sandals in the store? Because they're Birkenstock.
Why can't orphans have relationships?
Because they have no one to call "daddy."
How did they figure out what kind of shampoo Paul Walker used? They found his “head and shoulders” in the dash.
Gay orphans don't exist cuz they have no one to call "daddy," and lesbian orphans don't exist cuz they have no one to call "mommy."
These jokes are so dark they almost stole my bike.
Why do orphans go to church? Because they can finally call someone "father."
How do you know when an orphan is lying?
When they say, "I swear on my mother's life."
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't reach home.