What do a stool and an emo have in common?
They both sit still.
They Jokes
Why do orphans like pedos? Because they have someone to call "daddy."
Go punch an orphan, what are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Why do midgets giggle when they run?
Because the grass tickles their balls.
If you're mad, go punch an orphan. What are they going to do, tell their mom?
I went to McDonald's and I saw a line of fat people because they were selling free hamburgers.
The only time that cows will make noise is when they are in the moooo-d.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana.
Jack got high, grabbed Jill's thigh, and said, "I know you wanna."
Jill said yes, lifted up her dress, and then they had some fun, but silly Jill forgot her pill, and now they have a son.
Why can’t orphans go to daughter and dad dance night? They don’t have a dad to go with.
What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, because they are walls.
Why can you bully orphans?
What are they gonna do, tell their parents? Oh wait, they got no parents.
Go up to your friend and say: "It smells like updog."
They will likely reply: "What's updog?"
To which you reply: "Nothing much, what about you?"
Why do women only use their left arm? Because they don’t have rights.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
They don't know where home is! 🤣
You know how sometimes you want to listen to music?
But everything you listen to is just supremely unsatisfying, even if it's songs you usually love; they are just so unappealing, and you have no idea what you actually want to listen to.
One of my students asks, "Can I have a bookmark?"
A year of school and they still don't know my name is Danny.
Why can’t an orphan play baseball?
They can’t find home.
Why don’t pedophiles win races?
They like to come in a little behind.
Why do orphans only have 362 days of the year?
... bc they don’t have Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, or Thanksgiving.
Why are dogs born with balls?
They were having their stick moment when they got given birth, too.
