They jokes

Why do orphans like Monopoly?

To cry about the money they can’t earn in real life.

People, when your lover cheats on you, do this!

1. Start a conversation. 2. Say, "What's that smell?" 3. They will smell around. 4. Say, "OMG, it's a b****," and walk away and ignore them.

People complain we are overpopulated.

Well, then if we committed suicide, then why do they be sad? It's one less person to think about. Why complain about it when in the end we become sad people?

If you're a cat person, never let hungry Chinese into your house. They might just have a snack.

What did the emo say to the popular kid?

"Go fuck yourself for thinking all emos cut because they don't... y'know, for a matter of fact, fuck all you guys..."

EVERYONE:

"My boyfriend, Danny, broke up with me. Can some hot guy come, so I can interview them and see if they wanna date me?"

Why can't orphans go on a field trip? Because they don't have a parent's signature.

When you tell the men in the suits you can see that the demons of your sins are watching you...

But they know you're blind.

What does a school bus crash and a train crash have in common?

They always line up.