Thereness jokes
I asked my mom what her biggest regret was for a project at school, and she said, "Oh, go look in the bathroom above the sink..." There was a mirror.
Why was there a box in a church? Because there was a funeral.
Arabs: WHO PUT THAT TOWER THERE... we must destroy it!
Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Only.
Only who?
Only you make my heart beat fast.
This is true. Today I was at the mall and there was a guy holding a sign that said, "Need money for strippers and weed."
I heard they're making a film about Jimmy Savile, it's a very touchy subject.
I heard the film about is so boring it puts you to sleep.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Die.
Die who?
Me, I want to die.
I refuse to believe my dad got fired as a road worker for theft. But when I came home, there were signs everywhere.
There's a difference between my brother and Stephen Hawking.
At least Stephen Hawking does something.
Knock knock.
Who's there? It's the Grim Reaper.
Grim Reaper who?
The Grim Reaper who is about to come in your house, smoke some weed, drink some Grim Reaper liquor, and then get drunk.
Why do Indians have a red dot on their head?
Because they're recording.
Hi, um okay... Knock! Knock! Who's there? Doris! Doris who? Doris look I need the key!
Um...oh here another one! Okay...so sorry I type random things on these joke sites...anyway...okay. What is a book never written: "Beautiful sites of the corel rife written by the ocean!"
Knock knock. Who's there? Stephen Hawking. Wheelie?
There's an upside to being an orphan; every snack they get is family size.
There once was a man that wanted to join a group of right-handed men, but he wrote with the other hand. He got left behind.
God said, "Let there be light." Chuck Norris said, "You have to say please first."
How do you know if there's a vegan in the room?
Wait 2 minutes and they'll tell you.
Akeld: Do you think I should get an edges or a tapeline?
Me: Why not make both of them there? They're both messed up anyway.
There are 206 bones in my body.
When I look at you, it becomes 207.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Anita.
Anita who?
Anita poo let me in!