Thereness jokes
Why can't orphans have sex?
Because there is nobody to call "daddy."
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Terrier.
Terrier who?
Your Halloween decorations are terri-fying!
Knock, knock.
Who is there?
Your Nan.
WHAT? MY NAN IS DEAD!
Few jokes (sorry if they have already been used).
1 I couldn't figure out why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.
2 Why does Humpty Dumpty love autumn? Because he always has a great fall.
3 Have you heard the one about the skunk? Never mind, it really stinks.
4 It's always windy in a sports arena. All those fans.
5 What is the best day to go to the beach? Sunday, of course!
6 Comic Sans walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve your type here."
7 What's the easiest way to get straight As? Use a ruler.
8 Why were they called the Dark Ages? Because there were lots of knights.
Q: Why can’t Stephen Hawking go to the countryside?
A: There’s no signal.
When God said, "Let there be light," He saw your mum and said, "Let there be dark."
Why can't an orphan play baseball? Because there is no home plate.
Man: Knock, knock...
Boy: Who's there?
Man: Bear...
Boy: Bear who?
Man: Bear bottom.
Driving on a road at night and hit a speed bump. Remember, there are no speed bumps... I hit Bambi!
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because on his side, there was a KFC shop.
I was taking my dog on a long walk when I heard a loud scream. I ran towards the sound. There I found Penaldo sinking in a pit of mud. I was trying to help him out when my dog said, "Leave him, he's been in the mud for years." I walked away shocked but not surprised.
I can't not believe you stupid fucks. This isn't funny. Just like a bunch of cunts not to believe there is nothing can't do.
BTW what do you call a manly woman's cunt? Nothing. Who gives a fuck?
I've Benin there.
I'm Ghana go.
I've got to Togo.
Why was there peanut butter in the middle of the road?
It went with the traffic jam.
There was once a dark room with a dark light and a terrible electrician.
There are two sexes: one with your mother and the other with you.
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Knock knock.
Who's there?
Algorithm.
Algorithm who?
Think Algorithm to the store.
What did my dad say before he went to go get milk?
"There's money in my wallet for pizza. I love you."
I wrote puns on a piece of paper like this:
P. P. P. P. U. U. U. U. N. N. N. N. S. S. S. S.
Then I showed them to my teacher, asking him what they had in common.
“They are all very tearable,” he replied.
Well, there is one person who gets it!