Them jokes

I saw a bus the other day with some boy scouts at the back. One of them was having fun getting his knot-tying badge.

Wanna know who can jump the highest? Emo kids, some of them are still in the air.

How do you confuse a blonde?

Tell them to stand in the corner in a round room.

Your breasts remind me of Mount Rushmore – my face should be among them.

If somebody gives you lemons, cut them in half and do the juice in his eyes.

A missionary went to visit an orphanage in Thailand. After looking around, he asked the manager, "Why do these kids have numbers instead of names on their shirts? And why are some of them the same?"

The manager smiled and said, "Those are price tags."

Orphans are pretty tough. I mean, you never see them running home...

I got in trouble at school today because I played the knife game with a pair of scissors, but I couldn't flip them off because I was missing that finger.

To whoever stole my antidepressants, why do you need them?

My dad is really angry at me for kicking the balls. He's the one that told me always aim for them. Is that why I don't have a brother?

One day I was just sitting around when my butthole began to grow larger. It grew and grew and began to engulf the other parts of my body until it swallowed them all. Now I am just a big butthole typing this. Please help me!

How do you make people mad? You use the wrong category. It makes them go red.

What do Myspace and my dad have in common?

I haven't seen them in a while.

Why do emos hang themselves? Because no one wants to hang around them.

Police: Come with me, I’m taking you home.

Orphan: Well, we need to find them first.

Police: Then I don’t need to take you home.

Sally had 69 boobs, which was 222 many, 69,222. So she went to the doctor on 51st street, 69,222,51, who gave her pills. She took them 8 times a day, and now she is boobless.

Is "buttcheek" one word, or should I spread them?

My teachers told me I'd never amount to much because I procrastinate so much.

I told them, "Just you wait!"

Q: What does encyclopedia mean by cut them in triple?

A: Encyclopedia, more like "An Cyclone Media!"

Every kid in a classroom is relevant, because if one of them gets shot, they will all be featured on the news.