Them Jokes

I didn't mean to call an Afghanistan hotline. I told them I was depressed, then they asked if I know how to drive a truck. I don't know how that has anything to do with it!

Little Johnny walked into his parents' room to see them going at it.

He asked his mom what they were doing, and she said, "Uh, we're play fighting," and he's like, "With no clothes on?"

She said, "Yeah," and so he said, "Let me join you then..."

In a game, there are crew members that have to keep the ship running. But little did they know, there was an imposter among them.

Sound familiar? 🤔

Well, in September 11th...

So I told an orphan to slap themselves until they are wanted. I came back the next day to see them slapping themselves. Then I stopped them and told them to punch themselves.

The next day I saw a dead orphan.

My balls are high, just like the towers, but when something impales them, they begin to sag.

Guy: Are you a vending machine? Because you're a snack.

Girl: Your card got declined.

Guy: That's ok, you got to bang them a few times to get you money's worth.

My dad said people shouldn’t get ribbons just for participating because it rewards them for losing.

So I took down his confederate flag.