Them jokes
Every kid in a classroom is relevant, because if one of them gets shot, they will all be featured on the news.
An orphanage is like a horse rescue: you rescue them, you rehabilitate them, and then you sell them to the highest bidder.
I love it when your parents come round for Christmas. I just wish we couldn't hear them through the ceiling.
Why can’t orphans win trophies?
Because they can’t take them home.
Why do depressed people want to kill themselves?
To be loved on the news show for 10 minutes.
One day I was just sitting around when my butthole began to grow larger. It grew and grew and began to engulf the other parts of my body until it swallowed them all. Now I am just a big butthole typing this. Please help me!
I like Christmas.
It’s the holiday where an old man breaks into people’s homes so he can give them toys! :) yaaaaay 😁
Why do trees never call Emos? Because they always hang up on them.
What do orgasms and pulses have in common?
I don’t care if they have either of them.
How does a non-binary ninja kill someone?
They slash them.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
It depends on how hard you throw them.
9/11 is like genders.
There used to be two of them, and now it’s a touchy subject.
Dark humor and women are very similar...
Not everyone appreciates them, but they both give everyone something to make fun of.
I congratulated my friend on losing all that baby weight. She started crying and told me I should make them for miscarriage like that......
What do black parents and elevators have in common?
Neither of them can raise anything without a belt.
What do a 9V battery and a butthole have in common?
We know we’re not supposed to put our tongue on them, but we do it anyway.
As I am from South Carolina, I just thought about something Jefferson Davis would have thought about:
"Them slaves taking credit for everything."
Did the tree high five the emos?
No, he just left them hanging.
If your eyes were the sea, I would drown in them.
How do you know if a chick is too fat?
If you pull her pants down, her ass is still in them.