Them jokes

9/11 is like genders.

There used to be two of them, and now it’s a touchy subject.

If anyone ever makes a time machine, please make a bunker for Hitler/the Nazis and send them to 2050. I want to see who would die first, future us or them.

Canada being the most educated country in the world is bemusing, considering that Canadians cannot spell "legalise" and "programme" correctly.

Oh, and most of them do not realise that it's day-month-year, NOT month-day-year.

What do your girlfriend and a pool have in common? They both cost a lot of money for the amount of time you’re inside them.

Yoo! I found a $100 bill, found a child who said they lost their $100 bill. Gave them $25.

When God gives you glory, you give it back.

What is an orphan's favorite toy?

Answer: A boomerang, because it is the only thing that comes back to them.

What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?

At least one of them gets picked.

My family is like treasure; you need a map and a shovel to find them.

What is an orphan’s least favorite movie?

"Spider-Man," because it told them there was no way home.

I didn't mean to call an Afghanistan hotline. I told them I was depressed, then they asked if I know how to drive a truck. I don't know how that has anything to do with it!

Little Johnny walked into his parents' room to see them going at it.

He asked his mom what they were doing, and she said, "Uh, we're play fighting," and he's like, "With no clothes on?"

She said, "Yeah," and so he said, "Let me join you then..."

In a game, there are crew members that have to keep the ship running. But little did they know, there was an imposter among them.

Sound familiar? 🤔

Well, in September 11th...

What do you call a person with 2 black eyes?

Nothing, you told them twice.

I punched an orphan and told him to go back to his parents and tell them about it... Oh, wait.

So I told an orphan to slap themselves until they are wanted. I came back the next day to see them slapping themselves. Then I stopped them and told them to punch themselves.

The next day I saw a dead orphan.

Why do orphans have no bruises?

Because they have no dad to beat them.

Did the tree high five the emos?

No, he just left them hanging.

I saw a kid crying, so I asked them, "Where are your parents?" Then she cried harder, so I left the orphanage.

What’s the similarity between my dick and my girlfriend?

I beat both of them.

My balls are high, just like the towers, but when something impales them, they begin to sag.