Them jokes
How to make an orphan's feet bleed? Make them run in place until their parents get them.
Why do Swedish warships have barcodes on them?
So that when they return to port, they can Scandinavian.
If you want to pick on someone, pick on orphans. Let them tell their parents.
Double!
Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere!
Triple!
Why did Bob cross the road? Because he wasn't wearing his seatbelt.
So I saw a bag full of children near a dumpster. I guess we know where the orphans are when the parents didn’t want them.
Wouldn’t want to hope a Catholic priest comes along, otherwise the priest will have new sex toys.
Neither of them respect boundaries.
Why are friends a lot like snow?
If you pee on them, they disappear.
In his dream, some people gave the Hodja nine gold coins, but Hodja wanted ten. So he refused them. Suddenly, he awoke and saw that his hands were empty. So, he quickly closed his eyes again and said, "It's okay, I'll take the nine coins."
I'm just here to say that I don't approve of political jokes.
I've seen too many of them get elected.
What’s the difference between a retard and a zombie? Nothing much, they both dribble, moan, are hungry, walk weirdly, and it takes a bullet in the head to put them both down.
A professional golfer driving his Porsche picked up an Irish girl hitchhiker. He had his golfing gear on the back seat. The Irish girl picked up something and asked, "What are these?"
"Those are tees," he said. "I rest my balls on them when I drive."
"Wow!" said the girl. "What will those car makers think of next!"
Did you know that most women are left-handed?
That’s because the majority of them don’t know what to do with rights.
Why aren't Down's syndrome jokes funny?
Because the format of them is ugly.
Autists either believe everything you tell them or are nonstop skeptics. There is no in-between.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how big they are and how hard you throw them.
When someone got the ghost in them, sound in the Priest Busters.
When something strange and it ain't no who you gonna call? Priest Busters.
The teacher said she made the kids guess what a random word was, and it was honey. She also gave them a sample of honey to make it a little easier.
Teacher said that it was something that you eat and what parents call each other. Little Johnny said, "I know what it is now! Spit them out now guys, their Buttholes!"
How do you get 4 gay guys on a bar stool? You turn it upside down.
How do you get them back off again? You jerk them off.
Listen, my friends say I am gay, but I tell them I am not because I am not happy. In fact, I have no life. You are my friend. I trust you with my life. Now, can you take it?
You wanna know how to get rid of potential scam callers?
Next time you get a call from them, just answer the phone and say, "Pizza Hut abortion clinic, where yesterday's loss is today's sauce, how may I help you?"
What's the difference between a priest and customer service?
At least you can call customer service and tell them how your experience was.