Them jokes
A Mario & Luigi joke.
What are the Mario bros' view on child support?
Mario: The parents are obligated to provide for the child and help them the best they could.
Luigi: LMAO I GOTTA GO!
I love it when your parents come round for Christmas. I just wish we couldn't hear them through the ceiling.
An orphanage is like a horse rescue: you rescue them, you rehabilitate them, and then you sell them to the highest bidder.
Every kid in a classroom is relevant, because if one of them gets shot, they will all be featured on the news.
Q: What does encyclopedia mean by cut them in triple?
A: Encyclopedia, more like "An Cyclone Media!"
Memes
How do you make people mad? You use the wrong category. It makes them go red.
Is "buttcheek" one word, or should I spread them?
A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar.
The bartender looks at them and says, “What is this – a joke?”
My teachers told me I'd never amount to much because I procrastinate so much.
I told them, "Just you wait!"
Why do depressed people want to kill themselves?
To be loved on the news show for 10 minutes.
Why can’t orphans win trophies?
Because they can’t take them home.
How do you disrespect an Asian?
Give them driving lessons.
How do you piss off a color blind person?
Give them a Rubik's cube.
How do you punish a blind person?
Hand them a gun and tell them it’s a hairdryer.
All these people on here making me wish I knew them IRL.
How do you get a retard out of a tree?
Wave at them.
Even people who are good for nothing can bring a smile to your face.
For instance, when you push them down the stairs.
Why do women wear panties with flowers on them?
In loving memory of all the faces that have been buried there.
Why do blonde prostitutes prefer blowjobs?
They hate it when you hand it to them.
What do orgasms and pulses have in common?
I don’t care if they have either of them.