Me as a 5-year-old: How do you relate to the Twin Towers?
Friend: What?
Me: Every time I think of them, I feel sad.
I love it when your parents come round for Christmas. I just wish we couldn't hear them through the ceiling.
How many babies does it take to paint a house? It depends how hard you throw them.
I like Christmas.
It’s the holiday where an old man breaks into people’s homes so he can give them toys! :) yaaaaay 😁
Like if you listen to Kidd G.
Comment if you listen to Polo G.
Share if you listen to NBA Youngboy.
Do all if you listen to all of them and you all of them if Kobe Bryant is a legend.
When people tell me to "go to hell," I tell them their address.
How do u make a orphans hands bleed
Make them clap until their parents come back
What do women and screen doors have in common? The more you bang them the looser they get
A missionary went to visit an orphanage in Thailand. After looking around, he asked the manager, "Why do these kids have numbers instead of names on their shirts? And why are some of them the same?"
The manager smiled and said, "Those are price tags."
Timmy had 66 toys. He said it was "2 many (662)," so he gave them to Mr. Divide. He gave 21. Equals flip it over! It’s weird.
What do parents tell little boys to make them behave?
"Be good, or when you're asleep, Michael Jackson will get you!"
I got in trouble at school today because I played the knife game with a pair of scissors, but I couldn't flip them off because I was missing that finger.
Orphans are pretty tough. I mean, you never see them running home...
If somebody gives you lemons, cut them in half and do the juice in his eyes.
What do orgasms and pulses have in common? I don’t care if they have either of them
Papyrus: Sans, I have a joke. What do you call someone lazy and incompetent?
Sans: What do you call them?
Papyrus: YOU! NOW GET UP AND CLEAN YOUR ROOM, YOU LAZY BONES!
Wanna know who can jump the highest? Emo kids, some of them are still in the air.
How do you get a depressed person to jump?
Put them on a bridge.
I saw a bus the other day with some boy scouts at the back. One of them was having fun getting his knot-tying badge.
to whoever stole my antidepressants,why do you need them
