Them jokes

Cats are like onions; when I cut them, I cry.

Whoever is an orphan and wants these to go, or if you just want them to go away, comment down below, or if you can't comment, give it a thumbs up!

What's the different between Stephen Hawking and Rocket League? Both of them can't stand up.

What is the difference between a banana and a helicopter? Neither of them is a police officer.

All of them suck.

Brian was shopping at a mall. He hopped onto an escalator. Next to him were two people having an argument. Eventually, one of them pulled out a pocket knife threatening to stab the other. Brian murmured "Well, that escalated quickly..."

A man is telling his story to someone. "My friends always said that they would kill me if I wore Gucci or Supreme. On April 1st, I wore both and conversed with them."

"Interesting."

"That's the story of how I got to the morgue," he says to The Gatekeeper of Heaven.

People want to be nice to each other because they only have one life, and they want to live it well.

Sucks to be them. I'm a cat.

Your earlobes are so big, you can fit your mom inside of them 5000 times and still have room for more!

Q: What is the difference between Americans and Africans? A: Some of them have food, and some of them don't have food.

Why do orphans like pedos? Because it's someone that loves them and they can call "daddy."

Sometimes women are like bad snacks. People try them and then chuck them in the trash.

What’s the difference between apples and orphans?

One of them has a family tree.

My grandpa warned people the Titanic would sink, but they wouldn’t listen, so he kept warning them. Then he was kicked out of the theater.

Guys, if you saw a post from someone pretending to be me, don't listen to them.

I'm just going to be out for 3 days, or maybe for a month break. There are a lot of fakers.

Why do people in wheelchairs get bullied?

'Cause they can’t stand up for themselves.

Why do orphans hate Geometry?

Because it reminds them that their parents are poley-gone.

I know this is a very corny joke.

How is a beer can and an Indian the same? You can find them both smashed on the side of the road!

My mate caught me sniffing his disabled sister's knickers the other day. It wouldn't have been so bad, but she was wearing them at the time. It made the rest of the funeral so awkward.

Don't take my posts seriously, take them like your ex took you—as a joke.