It's opposite day today. I'm gonna tell an orphan that their parents are here.
That Jokes
Official Dj Penaldo playlist.
1. "I'm a fraud" 2. "I need you (ft. Tap-ins)" 3. "I Want to Leave Mid United" 4. "Back where I belong (ft. Europa league)" 5. "TY Eder" 6. "Nobody wants me (Rejectnaldo Remix)" 7. "Fuck that kid (ft. Lil Broke phone)" 8. "Sewy (Benched +arms crossed version)"
What is worse than a baby getting hanged in a tree?
That same baby getting hanged in multiple trees.
I told my orphan girlfriend that I had to grab milk. (Goes to the store, grabs milk.) As I grab the milk, I thought, "Hey, I bet I can repeat her life twice."
I wish that people would stop mailing jokes about Kobe Bryant. Guys, all they do is crash and burn!
He turns, he shoots!
And that is a horrible end to the Grand National...
What do you call a serial killer that only kills fat people?
A mass murderer.
I couldn't imagine being Abe Lincoln, that would be mind-blowing!
I have a lot of respect for trans women.
That surgery takes balls!
Yo mamma is so dumb that she smokes to burn calories!
I told my friend that we should dress up as P. Diddy and Drake for Halloween and ask parents if their kid wants to come over for a sleepover.
I walked in on my dad fucking my little brother. I don't know what was worse: the fact that he was fucking my brother, or the fact that the abortion clinic let my parents take the fetus home....
"Dad? What's dark humor?" "See that man with no arms over there, son, tell him to clap." "But daddy, I'm blind."
If 2 + 2 is 4, and 4 + 4 is 8, then that must mean I can lick your pussy.
Why is sucking cock inside the confessional booth the only thing that a catholic priest doesn't have to give up for lent?
Because catholic priests don't have to be vegetarians during lent.
There was a girl I used to date, only to find out that she used to be a man. You could say, she put me in a trans.
What did the skeleton say to the other? "Wow, that song, 'Spooky Scary Skeletons,' really does send chills down my spine!"
The last joke about the dad was a joke. Don't take it seriously. Can't believe that people actually think that was true.
Did you know that a lot of graves are put in churchyards?
Yeah, they're pretty holey.
Son: Dad, I know I'm adopted.
Dad: Well, how do you know?
Son: I found the adoption papers.
Dad: That is for your mum.
If you know, you know.
