That jokes

Woman one: "I got so mad at my GPS today that I told it to go to hell!"

Woman two: "Did that work?"

Woman one: "Well, it took me to my in-laws’ house."

Yo mama is so ugly, if she got a pound for every boy that found her unattractive, boys would find her attractive.

What do you call a dinosaur that can’t eat?

Anarexic.

That’s right, I have my own category😎

Déjà Vat: the feeling that you’ve heard that bad joke before.

What is black and white and red all over?

Answer: A newspaper.

That is what my 3-year-old told me.

First date be like:

Me: "I work with animals every day."

Her: "Oh, how sweet! What is it exactly that you do with them?"

Me: "I'm a butcher."

Went to my local Indian restaurant and asked the waiter for a chicken tarka Masala.

The waiter said, "What's that?"

I said, "It's the same as a tikka, just a little otter."

Every 911 joke isn't that good.

Well, at least not until they come crashing down.

Deez nuts, can we get much higher?

Boioioioing boioioioing, my name Jeff.

Arabic Nokia ringtone, bingchungus, wholesome 100, everyone liked that, Keanu Reeves chungus, Ugandan Knuckles, YouTube poop XDDDDDDDDDDDD.

Your mum. That's all I need to say.

What do you call pasta that’s made by a skeleton? A CREEPYpasta! (It’s my first one, lol)

What do you call a dog that fell into the Porta-Potty?

A Corgi Potty.

What did one casket say to the other casket?

"Is that you coughin'?"

My wife said to me, "You really have no sense of direction, do you?"

I said, "Where the fuck did that come from?!"

Why does a blind man still have eyes?

So he can see that he can't see.

Little Johnny's neighbor just had a baby. He got invited to dinner with his neighbor. Little Johnny's dad said if he mentioned "ears" he will get a spank.

So Johnny looked in the bassinet. They were talking about the new baby. Johnny's mum said, "What beautiful eyes."

"That is great," said little Johnny, "because he will be stuffed if he needed glasses."

A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight live longer than the men who mention it.

One time, little Johnny was watching TikTok, and he saw a toy that he wanted so badly, so he cleaned up the whole house and did his homework. When he was done, he saw a spill on the table. He went to the sink to grab a cloth, but when he came back, it was gone. He went to his mom's room and saw a drink with the label "daddy's drink," so he drunk it and said, "It's daddy's; he won't mind," and all day he was like the Flash. So he went back, turned the bottle around, and it said "Speedy," and then he said, "Oh, great heavens!"

If your controller ever dies, remember those people that died on the submersible.