That jokes
Déjà Vat: the feeling that you’ve heard that bad joke before.
"Dick, you're fired."
"I'd buy that for a dollar."
The DNA told the tailor that he couldn't find his genes.
In fright, I saw my faceless soul! Never imagined it could run that fast!
Did you hear that story "Three Lines in the Sand?" By dickadraggin'.
i would try so hard not to laugh if that person was next to me
Jerry: My dad got into a fight on a plane.
Jeremy: That's just *plane* crazy!
What did the fish say to the other fish when it got hooked?
"That's what you get for not keeping your mouth shut."
I learned that a strangler was targeting me.
All I could think was, "You’ve got to be choking me!"
They say that bad things happen to good people.
So if you get run over by a car just know you're a good person.
If you're cleaning a vacuum cleaner, does that make you the vacuum cleaner?
What comes after 611? 711.
What comes after that? 811.
What comes after that? George W. Bush.
What do you call a fish that can use a katana?
A salmon-rai.
A farmer told me that he wanted a couple of acres, so I punched him in the teeth.
Why did that fish cross the road?
Just for the halibut (hell of it)!
What do you call a router in a thong?
CISCO....(that thong thong thong thong!)
Bertold Brecht & Tork Poettschke visit the places of their youth together. One says to the other: "Here used to be the Phoenix Lake. Where did he go?" "That was probably a pirate ..."
Geowipp Grand Prize. And the CHOICE OF FOOD IS INSANE. We love him and we love him.
August is a guy from one of the shops, and we became a sundwich durk through Habin. We have GOT GO GO, IT WAS GRAT. That's why. But we don't do everything.
Did you hear about the tourist that came to New York? Good, because they were a terrorist... When they were asked why they were traveling, they just mispronounced it.
I remember when I saw my dad's penis for the first time.
I said, "Dad, don't text me shit like that."
Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. It was evolution.