That jokes

Fortnite

Fortnite is so bad that when you try to play, trash is always in your way. LOL

Hairline

Your hairline is so far back that when I wrote it on a chalkboard, it did not erase.

Butler

I wanted to hire a butler for my new mansion in downtown LA. As he arrived, he introduced himself and I discovered it was Ghostionel Pessi.

I asked him why is he working as a butler? He told me that “a big game is coming up so he needs to refine his bottleling skills.” DAMN PESSI!

McDonald's

Did you know that McDonald's have a new McScully burger?

It's a 59-year-old piece of meat in a 2-year-old bun.

Ex

When you're so rich that you can buy anything, you end up getting a cow in your living room. Yeah, anyways, my ex is still in my living room.

Mom

When I was 11, my mom came home from the bar super drunk that night, and I just wanted to know if they knew where the cat was because I heard a noise. We had a loooooooong talk the next morning.

Body

"Why can’t you be comfortable with my own body?"

"I think you should ask yourself that."

Comeback

Ex-bf's gf: You're so ugly as hell.

Me: Oh, did I mention that I was trying to be you?

Doctor

You're so ugly that when you were born, the doctor threw you out the window, and the window threw you back.

Violet

Roses are red, that much is true.

But violets are violet, not f*ing blue!

Villain

If I had a dime for every time I heard someone say that F was the villain (Alphabet Lore), I would be rich.

Cockroach

Having cockroaches in the house is a sign that you've food.

These things are like Ugandan girls, they hate poverty.

Grandpa

Hey, that's the thing my grandpa has. They say that to treat it, I should call him a bitch!

Sandal

I'm still wondering who took Jesus' sandals.

Even the one who ate that dove that sat at Jesus' shoulder. 🤔

Jesus

Why did Jesus come back from the dead? He forgot to tell you that you're gay!

Grandma

The only difference between my grandma and the twin towers is that they collapsed faster than my grandma.